I think she needs to have a home caregiver or assisted living. She has some money in the bank and relies on social security. But she won't budge. She's very healthy with only an aspirin a day so she thinks she's just old. As we don't really have a primary care dr because she only goes once a year I am at a loss as to where to begin. She is a spouse of a veteran so should I start there? Seems that she is sliding downhill fast as today she said the clocks were changing times...but a couple of days ago seemed fine. I'm thinking maybe an infection?? Appreciate any help as I have a sibling who wants nothing to do with her and no other family except my husband. I have medical POA but not financial. Thank you

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No one has financial POA. She won't budge. And she could never live with me - I would be divorced and then dead.

I like the urgent care option - thank you. She may go for that because it doesn't seem like a real Dr.

Medicaid is not an option either as she has $ resources so my understanding is that she has to spend that down to apply. I am be incorrect about that.

Thank you all very much. This forum has literally saved my sanity.
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Start by checking for a UTI. Urgent care might be an option for this.
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She should be checked by a Doctor for any number of things from the beginnings of any type of Dementia to a UTI.
You do have a few options.
If she is well and can care for herself at this point and you find it acceptable she could move in with you or you with her. (depending on the circumstances)
Or you can tell her that Assisted Living is one option or having a caregiver some in a few times a week or more often is the other option.
This will also depend on her financial ability to pay of Assisted Living or a Caregiver. Or at some point applying for Medicaid. If that is a possibility then the best thing to do would be get her into a facility that also accepts Medicaid so that when funds are low they can help the application process and there is also a good possibility that she would be able to remain rather than finding another place to live that has Medicaid spots open. (many places will accept a Medicaid eligible person if they can private pay of at least a year.)
The big question for you is can you handle your Mom living with you and your husband without it destroying your lives.
And who has Financial POA? they may have other plans or other ideas.
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