My mom passed away 2 years ago. My parents RV'd for the past 15 years so they had no permanent home but at the end, they had rented a home in Arizona. My parents spent the last 20+ years living on the west coast.
At the end of 2015, my dad - who is 80 with no health issues - was living in Washington state at an RV park. He liked it in the summer but the winter was cold and rainy. And he was tired of being so far from me and my brothers (I live in North Carolina, my brothers are in Massachusetts). The winters are too rough in New England so I told my dad to come live with me and find a house rental here in North Carolina. He sold the RV and his truck, put stuff in a storage place and came to NC (he also has a storage unit in Arizona). He's been living with me and my 2 teenage children for about 10 weeks.
Here's the issue - we've been looking at homes to rent (my dad has bad knees so he needs something without stairs) and we've seen many but every one he looks at, he finds an issue with - usually the issue is cleanliness - he wants it spotless. We finally found a decent rental and he signed a lease. The day after he signed, he called the woman and said he wouldn't be moving in because the fan above the stove was very dirty.
That was about 2 weeks ago and now he is just a mess. He doesn't know what to do, where to go, etc. He's had a rental car while at my house, which he is returning tomorrow so now he will be without a vehicle.
And to make matters worse, my older daughter got out of the army and is living with us too. And my dad and her do not get along so there's a bit of tension in the home, which is affecting all of us.
Honestly. he could stay with me forever but I know he feels uncomfortable. I have a 2 story home and his "bedroom" is the dining room and although it's off the main area of the home, he has to go upstairs to use the shower.
I try to spend as much time with him as I can. We are not the "sit at the table every night to eat" type but we have been since he's moved in with us, because he likes it. But if I don't spend time with him at night watching sports (that's all he watches), he gets upset. I work and it's usually 50+ hours a week. And sometimes I just need time by myself. He has a hard time understanding that because after spending time in my room watching tv alone. the next morning I'll get the "I'm sorry I'm bothering you" speech.
I don't know what to do next. My kids are upset, I'm tired of trying to please him 24/7 and he's upset. He told me last night that he hasn't been sleeping and just doesn't know what to do with the rest of his life. And I don't know what to say.
Any advice would be wonderful.