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I'd have him checked for depression. There seems to be a lack of caring for himself here. The showering is something that can happen when other senses go, or when dementia is present. He needs to be checked by his doctor and maybe that doctor can great him for depression, if he feels that is the issue. Once depression is treated right (this can take some trial and error) he may be more willing to get other things done.
Carol
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I have trouble getting my husband to shower. I understand there are many reasons people with Alzheimer's don't like to bathe. Sometimes they have forgotten how to turn on the water, etc, and that is embarassing. Sometimes the experience is uncomfortable.,,the water hitting their skin is painful. Often they just forget. Sometimes my husband thinks he has had a shower. Before the "rare showers" phase, he took many showers...two or three a day. I believe that he forgot he had taken one at that time...now he forgets that he has not. I try to tie the shower to something he wants to do...as in..."we can go out for a snack after your shower." This works sometimes. Also, just beiing persistent helps. If he is averse to a shower I will sometimes drop it to avoid nagging him. This does annoy him. I just keep trying at different times, and sometimes "the stars just line up properly" and he agrees. Once he gets in the shower, he seems to enjoy it...but that doesn't make him want to do it more often. I wish you success.
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pa doesnt shower anymore , i wash him down real good while he s sittin on the toilet , at least he dont smell . but smells like a baby , using johnson shampoo bath soap .
he feels better , when i make him take a shower oh lord behold hes crying wa wa waaa and then i have a hard time with him .
so i dont do that anymore . sit on toilet pa im gonna wash ya down . he dont make a sound .
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marilynjean1200, have you tried a simple wash cloth wipe down, daily? I help my parent shower daily, and always offer the option for a wash cloth clean up in lieu of shower. It ensures that my parent is the one in control of showering, or not, but I can see that some days it is the equivalent of cutting a chronically ill person some slack. I use warm water on the cloth, which I have pre-soaked with some rubbing alcohol or menthol alcohol for minor aches and pains. Head-to-toe, followed by towel drying, then body lotion. Baby wipes for sensitive skin areas, separate face splash, and all's well that ends well. It may be that you start by only doing a back wipe down to avoid your Dad becoming agitated. I am assuming, of course, that he at least takes off his day clothes to change into pj's at night? If he does not, start with just helping him by changing his shirt, then tell him you see his skin is dry and you're just going to wipe his back down a little then add some lotion. Rather than taking him fast-forward, help him adjust to your helping him take his shirt off. Or, start with his face, and a nice warm wash cloth around his jaw using your cupped hands...and a smile. If it's been 6 months, just take tiny steps to help get him to where he needs to be. That, plus medical evaluation as soon as you can schedule an appointment for him. I agree with the advice others have shared with you.
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Is he not bathing because he is afraid of getting in the tub? You can get a shower chair. Is he still afraid to use the chair, then don't, a bath can be given while sitting on the toilet or on the bed. If he doesn't want anyone to touch him, then it's best that someone who does caregiving do it. If he resists a caregiver, his doctor could write a prescription for a caregiver/home health aide (and there are male ones) to come in for him.
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Viola, if my husband ever gets to the place where he will no longer take showers, I am going to tell him we'll shower together. I guarantee, that he'll be taking a shower then. ha.
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Did you mean 6 MONTHS or 6 DAY? 6 months I would think a person would wreak of not smelling good at all. Especially older folks they get a bit more ahem stinkier. My mom doesn't like bathing anymore either and that is just a recent development...what cracks me up is her caregiver has that as the first thing on the agenda...LOL. So the caregivers have ways to make them bathe. But this is what I did with my mom, just say okay mom/dad I am going to give you a nice bath and we will wash your hair, start getting your clothes off...and then start the bath with very warm water and very nice smelling bath bubbles. Perhaps once you get it started it may intrigue him to get in. Or if the bath is out...you could try it with the shower..get the shower nice and warm and steamy and again get a nice sponge full of that shower gel stuff. Let us know what happens!!!
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I have called in people that do this for a living , so I don`t have to be the bad daughter by giving my mom the " wicked " shower. The first time it was a little tough but this week she had her second and things went allot better. Good Luck.
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Works like a charm, those wash downs! Bless you and your Pa, hardebeck. Hugs.
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Thanks for your advices. But dad says he dont need shower that things are great just the way things are. He dont need shower and he will take care of his own private things himself. He says he dont like being told what to do. Thanks Marilyn
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