You couldn't dream this up! And my husband and I are SICK over this. At 93, she just got out of hospital new years day, and after having POA of her over a year, my husband thought it was time to take over the finances and pay bills. After just one month, she had a monsterous-like communication with him that he was a thief, and she wanted control back. Because her house is in her son's name as 1/2 owner, he had been trying to update and get insurance that would keep his own liability covered. In an attempt to fix insurance, a neighbor saw the insurance people taking pics of the house, harrassed them and got the elder to have an attorney call to put a stop to it. Long story short.... the neighbor has been wiggling her way into her life, getting paid to do everything for her and becoming her personal uber driver. So we now have to deal with a Protection from Abuse charge. She alleges we were in her house searching out valuables and cash.
And money we put into a savings in her name is what we stole. We cannot figure out what the trigger was. I believe there is a mental health issue. This behavior is so bizarre that I even thought she might be drugged by the neighbor. We could not get a doctor to check on her cognitive or any other abilities, as she would not go. We are now under law unable to go near because others have meddled in our family, yet she insists that this woman is good to her, as is like a daughter to her. (And let me tell you she disowned her REAL daughter several years ago)
I can see why people on here wish the elder would just pass away. He and I say she is TOXIC, and tell the rest of our family to stay away. She will live out her days very lonely with her newfound "daughter" and probably leave everything to her in a new will. We do not care, as her entire wealth only matches what we earn in rent payment in just two months time. Its the heart that aches and now the court issues. We are made to feel like criminals after treating her as best we could. Something SNAPPED, and we do not know what to do, nor are we allowed. I thought this only happened in the movies.
As far as house, my husband owns 1/2 outright She deeded her 1/2 to her other son with Right of survivorship.- transferred for $1. She no longer can do anything with deed. Its set in stone. Lawyer says she is a subservient tenant - living in someone elses house rent free.
PFA takes away POA rights, and now HER ATTORNEY says there is a new POA.
SCREWED UP in every way possible on an estate that is worth no more that the house value plus about 10 K cash. Not worth ever going for Guardianship as attorney says that can take 5K in legal fees, and house is a done deal. She will become ward of state if she needs to go in a home.????
so sorry about all this. At least you got something tge state can’t take.
Sometimes this doesn't really happen until she has some sort of hospital admission again...
Also ask APS about referrals to a social worker or counselor who can provide confidential support to you - not to get involved in the events, but to help you process the feelings involved.
Good luck and take care of your own health, and your husband's health. Try hard not to let this suck up all the air in your lives.
I hope, if you have been handling any finances at all, that you have good records and files to take to court with you.
I think the brother may need to testify about whomever was taking insurance pictures.
After that, yes, I would stay away from Mom and the neighbor welcome to her until she is diagnosed.
This may be an undiagnosed urinary tract infection if Mom's mentation started quickly.
The best thing that could happen is the APS filing as you may be able to convince them to convince Mom to get diagnosed. Cooperate with them. Tell them if you cannot get diagnosis and guardianship your Mom is in danger of elder abuse from her neighbor who has been insinuating herself into Mom's life.
Put it in their hands and abide by their decision.
You say your Mom is 93. Who currently lives with her?
Don't really do that, of course, but this sounds like delirium after a hospital stay, which is very common. Who is taking a stranger's word over her family's word and ordering you to stay away and on what evidence? Get a lawyer.
Have you contacted her doctor and talked about this? As POA, does your husband have that medical control, too? Sounds to me like the doctor should get involved (as if, but I can dream), but maybe he can provide some testimony as to her state of mind and whether her behavior is normal for her.