I'm so tired that I get upset with her. We've ruled out anything medical and tried so many things......from white noise, not drinking anything starting in the early afternoon, staying up later, going to bed earlier, eating less, eating more, melatonin/natural sleep aid, different types of bedding (everything cotton), excerising each time we get up, not talking at all, just going to the bathroom and getting back in bed, I'm out of ideas and I'm exhausted all of the time. She broke her hip about 3 months ago and has recovered so well, but this night time thing is awful for her, and for me. I hate to admit it but the lack of sleep is making me impatient with my Mom, whom I love so very much. She lives with me and is a wonderful lady...such a great attitude and so postiive 99 percent of the time. I feel like such a rotten daughter for not just dealing with this 'one' thing, when everything else is so good. I want to stop being impatient at night when we have to get up, so I go into another room and cry and then come back and lay down to try to get some sleep. Tonight I'm writing this note to see if anyone has any other ideas or things that you've tried that may work for us. Oh, and Mom is 94 and has short term memory dementia. Prior to her fall and broken hip, she stayed in her own room so I have no idea if she was getting up so many times during the night before. I guess I feel even worse because there are so many other people out there with such worse situations than me, that I should be happy that we have it so good.
I appreciate the answer with the meletonin causing dementia to get worse. Since starting Mom on the meletonin, she has slept better, but her Alz. has gotten worse. didn't know the drug would make it worse. It was prescribed by her doc, because I was giving her benedry to help her sleep....WOW maybe I do need a gerentologist.This has got to stop...
Based on the visit that Mom and I just had with the kidney specialist, having the urge and not being able to go, 'could' be a kidney issue and or a symtom of a UTI? There may be other symtoms as well, like constant fatigue, uncommom itching and other stuff too that I can't remember. You may want to explore more through blood and urine tests to rule out these medical reasons, if you haven't already. The main thing I've been learning through this process is that if you don't keep asking and asking, things could get overlooked or go on longer than they need to. You are your Mom's best advocate. I also feel your pain and understand what you are going through. You are not alone and I'm sending Hugs your way right now! KJ
Hi jk....please hang in there. Is there any way that you can get someone to come in and stay with your husband for a night or two during the week? This has helped me tremendously...to get at least a couple of good nights sleep during the week. Any other family members that could help. It was really hard for me to admit that I couldn't do it any more by myself because I really felt that I should be able to, and, that I was able to take care of my Mom's needs better than anyone else. Well, I was wrong, because with no sleep, I was not doing a very good job at all. Once I was able to 'accept' the help, it has changed my whole outlook. If things aren't done the way I usually do them, it's 'ok', and Mom is just fine. I don't know what your situation is, but I do know that you need to reach out and get some help. It is not humanly possible to do what you are doing without getting any sleep. Please, please, do that for yourself and for your husband. You are in my prayers and please let me know how you are doing. Hugs to you!!
My husband (Lewy Body Dementia for 9 years, age 86) has taken seroquel just before bed for more than 8 years. Due to a snafu in getting his prescription transferred to a new pharmacy we were without those pills for 3 nights last week. And we were right back to getting up several times a night, confused. Yikes! I do not want to ever go back to those days.
Obviously I can't say that seroquel is the right drug for your mother, but I feel strongly that you need to see some doctor who is willing to try various options until finding something that works. It was psychiatrist specializing in sleep problems that prescribed it for my husband, and the behavioral neurologist who manages his dementia (Mayo Clinic) concurred that it was worth trying.
I am so sorry that you are continuing to have this dibillitating problem!
Hugs to you and thanks for sharing.
My dad takes Lasix in the am and often he doesn't urinate as much as one would expect. At night, he takes Flomax which enables him to urinate for often, so we do get up at night and change him. He can no longer get out of bed on his own, so I don't have the worry of him falling. We just have to get up and check on him.
So in my dad's case it is specifically a male issue and the Flomax allows him to urinate more easily. He can't take the Flomax in the am, as it will drop his blood pressure and the BP med he takes has to be given in the am.
I don't know if your mom has water retention. Would some lasix in the morning help her urinate more often during the day and less at night?
You are a lovely daughter. Best wishes and I hope you get some sleep. You've been dealing with this for such a long time. Hugs, Cattails.