We recently added an additional caregiver to mother's care team. Initially things were going beautifully and appeared the relationship was a good fit. But after a recent hospital admission that came about because mom accidentally triggered her medic alert button during the night and was unable to effectively communicate to the EMT that her speech was a result of the dementia rather than a stroke. EMTs aired on side of caution and transported her to hospital against her consent. Since that incident I have noticed a significant decline. She has become even more fixated on her fear of dieing than before. Round the clock care has become necessary (understandably) and with that has presented some behaviors that have led me here. On a daily basis she spends the majority of her day talking about dying. On one hand she is petrified of being left alone for fear she will die alone. And then always follows that up with threats of killing herself. Which then usually progress into a prayer to god to help her. And now she has decided that 1 of her caregivers is trying to murder her. She will not really eat for her. She won’t take her meds for her. She won’t stay inside the house with the other caregiver and came up with a bruise on her arm that she said the caregiver caused. When I questioned her about it she said that bruise was already there (which it absolutely was not) when I questioned further she agreed that she had grabbed moms arm to prevent her from running out the door. Mom's always been a bit dramatic but she is not a liar. So I believe that mom truly believes what she believes. I am afraid we are at a point where while financially it would be the better option to admit her into memory care, with moms anxiety and age (97) she would not last more than a couple of months. She would literally feel so betrayed she would give up.
I know there is an answer to this dilemma I just don’t know what it is. I’m hoping some fresh eyes can bring to light some alternatives.