Grandparents have 2 children with each one being primary for either medical or financial and the other secondary. The child that is primary for medical has been an alcoholic since I was a child almost 40 years ago and recovered for about a year right after their father under went surgery for a brain bleed. At that time, grandparents did the POA, the child stopped drinking but since then has relapsed even worse. Grandparents won't even have the child drive them to appointments because of the drinking and have started question that child's ability to help make medical decisions. The other child has seen what the other sibling has been doing to their parents and treatment of them. Yelling at them until they get their way on how things are doing, telling people that they need to go into full time care and that doctor said that (doctor doesn't say that), telling the doctors that they can't care for themselves, that they fall, can't remember anything, not listening to their wishes for just daily living and not even talking to them about what they want or need.
The other child lives across country and can't be here everyday so us grandchildren have stepped in to help them. Our grandma is dealing with high blood pressing, gout, bladder problems and joint problem(can't get around fast or lift arms high). Grandpa has short term memory problems from brain surgery, allergies and asthma, and skin cancer. They can't drive, cook or clean. We go over and do these things for them and spend time with them. We have also been now taking them to the doctor instead of the child that has primary medical POA, getting prescriptions and everything else while the child now only comes over once a week or every other week. Also this child has their friend telling them how to take care of their parents and make the decisions for their parents health instead of talk to their parents or sibling. We are worried that even if the grandparents try to change the medical POA that the child will try to say they don't have the mental capability. Is this a case where we can say the medical POA is not mentally able to care for parents?