I am doing most of my husband's care when I can but I am also in need of a caretaker. What does one do in this situation?

Casper, there is a money and legal tab at the top of the page. You can use it to find CERTified elder care attorneys. My understanding of the way Medicaid works is that one's home is an exempt asset. (If you have other real estate, that might be a different issue). If your income is over the limit for your state, I'm told that there is a way to create a Medicaid compliant trust, so that while the overage goes into the trust, Medicaid is able to recoup it in the end.

If any lawyer tells you that they will help you "hide" assets from Medicaid, run!

Medicaid says that between the total of our income(a total of $2,023 per month) and the value of the property that we live on, we are not qualified. i will try to find an elder Attorney. Thanks for the information, I didn't know there was a specialty in this subject.

I'm curious why you don't qualify for Medicaid, and whether you have spoken to an Elder Care attorney about that.

No, he is at home. He does sleep alot unless I start bugging him to at least get up and join me in the kiving room or out on the porch. Don't get me wrong, he is engaged. I ust do't want to see him in bed.
We do not qualify for Medicaid but we have applied for the VA Aid & Assistance program. But you know how the military is. You can wait foever or an answer to one qwestion. So, I don't know where we stand in that respect.

Is your husband currently in rehab? If so, the social worker at that facility should be able to assist you; perhaps you can apply for Medicaid and receive help at home through that avenue. Or, is it possible that it's time for both of you to move to an Assisted Living facility, where you both could get help with daily living?