My mother in law suffers from Alzheimers disease. She has recently been cared for in the hospital for medical issues and it seems her symptoms or that the disease has progressed some since being back home. I've posted before, that my MIL is cared for by her eldest daughter M-Th. My husband (second oldest son) and I care for her F- Sun afternoon until my brother in law (youngest son) picks her up to spend the day with her until he returns her home.
The recent incident that occured left an argument between my husband and I that was very heated. I suggested looking for help, because although I am not blood relative I do help care for my MIL as much as I possibly can (including care for 2 small children). And I do see her situation worsening and I know that the way things are (frustration, stress, and impatience) that some kind of intervention is needed for my husband's family.
Once we settled down to actually talk thru our issues about this situation. My husband explained to me that it would be shameful and a disappointment to his late father if they were to not be the ones to personally provide care to his mother. But I see that their capability to care for her is being over shadowed by anger, guilt and frustration. And I am truly just trying to offer help and suggestion because my husband works so hard for my children and I and for his family. And I see it wearing on him everyday.
Does anyone have any advice or suggestion on how to take on this new chapter and how to better make this suggestion without seeming uncaring.