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Yes it's me, still care giving and finally have respite, can't leave him alone, I am very tired, had a fall from my bed on Veterans Day, been over a month, getting around better, but how long does the VA expect me to handle this. He has behavior disturbances, they try giving him "happy" pills, I don't know if he is taking them or throwing them away, don't see much difference in his Narcissistic ways. I know about the statistics on caregivers' life expectancy.As it is with many of us, I don't even know who I am anymore, because it is expected for us to change our lives to accommodate them, I have done this for over 15 years ever since I knew something was wrong.

Contact your county Veterans Services office. Ours is in the county courthouse. They will act as intermediary between you and the VA, and they will suggest and help you to file necessary forms.
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Reply to Fawnby
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no1cares Jan 4, 2026
Thank you for your info, I had no idea they could help in some circumstances,
and you are right that soon I don't think I will be able to do what I do now.
Much appreciated.
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Discuss with your own and your husband Medical care practitioners.
At some point you will be unable to give care. At that point call an ambulance for his safe transport to hospital and tell Social Workers there that he cannot return to the home as you cannot care for him and there is no one else.
Whether it is VA or not, they will assist with placement.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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no1cares Jan 4, 2026
I have heard of this before, at this place in time and at our ages, it will be a definite thought concerning how his health is, thank you.
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