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My grandmother has dementia but she is starting to get the behavioral issues that come along with it. She has had a few outbursts with us when she didn’t want to do something and wasn’t getting her way. She also had a stroke a few months ago and had temporarily lost her mobility so we hired a friend to get her up and give her showers but she was abusive to her and she ended up quitting when my grandmother became mobile. So my question is if home care agencies for elderly people have the experience and ability to handle difficulty that someone with dementia has as the condition progresses?

I have said it over and over again. When there is dementia, and it will get worse, as will the horrible behaviors, why, why, why do people put up with it. Thank god, caretakers can take just so much and leave and go away. But the family should not tolerate this and must accept the fact that it is time for them to be placed into a facility. No one, family or caretaker, should be put in a position of taking abuse from patients - ever. No one! Do it now before everyone is destroyed. It is not deserved to be treated like this.
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Reply to Rusty2166
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Imho, a possible U.T.I. may have to be addressed.
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Reply to Llamalover47
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Agree with other posts: some aides are experienced with dementia patients and sundowning but some aren’t. I always request aides with dementia experience because they know what comes with it. My mom is in the late stages of dementia so her behavior is extreme—with me or an aide. She’s on strong medication for anxiety which helps only for a while. When she starts acting up with the aide, it’s medication time. We let her settle down (meds kick in) before moving on. Usually takes 30 minutes.
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Reply to LoveLea
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Good question. You need to talk to the agencies and be open about the types of behavior problems your loved one has. Some are trained to deal with these types of issues; some not. I would also encourage you to talk to your loved one's primary care doctor about these issues. He/she can make a referral to a neurologist and/or a geriatric psychiatrist to help you plan interventions to deal with her outbursts and/or violence.
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Reply to Taarna
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We had this with mom for a while. The best caregivers were experienced with dementia and I think because they once had toddlers had the wonderful skill of pleasantly redirecting mom. It was incredible to watch. Good luck.
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Reply to janlee
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I don't care how long you have been a professional caregiver, you don't deserve constant abuse from a client. These CNAs get $10 to maybe $15 an hour. If with an agency, more like ten. They don't get paid enough to be abused. And if GM was in an AL, they would not allow the abuse.

There are medications that may calm GM down. Also, UTIs will cause this problem.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Anyone that has been taking care of the elderly for a while in a professional manner should be able to handle whatever your grandmother throws their way. So perhaps it would be best that you request someone with a few more years of experience under their belt.

And of course there may come the time, when her remaining at home is just not in anyone's best interest, including herself, so best now to get plan B in place just in case. I wish you the very best.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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Yes, some caregivers do and some do not. Some just have a gift for dealing with the most difficult situations. It will be trial and error to find a person that will work well with her.

That person will not care for her the way you do. And even the caregiver will need to have the opportunity for trial and error to find how best to work with your mom. You have to be patient.
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Reply to gladimhere
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