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My mother is 73 and has a husband 78 that just had a stroke and massive heart attack and is paralyzed from what I have been told. We have been estranged for personal reasons for 3 years. She is also trying to raise my sister's children 8 and 5.

Got any suggestions.

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do with her I should say do about the situation. I did not mention that she has severe health conditions and tried to help when she was in the hospital. The enstrangement was when her husband called me and asked me what I should do and I said I think you seek a second opnion about her condition. When I did he flipped. And I had to stay away from her because he would just start going off on her and she went into the hospital 6 times for flairs up of her afib. Now after 3 years she will not listen to anything I say. So i just backed away to make peace. Now I do not know her true mental state, she has 2 kids under 8 and someone with his conditions.
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This is my first attempt at answering a question, it is kind of scary :) If you mom's husband is in such bad shape, is he at home? Her taking raising the grandchildren at her age must be a huge task. The only advice I have to offer is that she will need help. You or someone else close to her needs to keep a close watch on the situation and be willing to jump in and help her seek the right kind of care for her husband. If she is healthy and of sound mind then she may be able to keep up with the kids. I realize that she had them for a good reason- I hope that there is an alternative if it becomes to hard for her to handle.

She may be resistant to anyone trying to help, so be prepared for that too. I am sure that someone else will chime in and give you more knowledgeable advice.
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What do you mean by "do with" her?
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