My mom has recently qualified for hospice. She has vascular dementia and COPD. I notice often she seems to be staring up--when nothing is there. Is this a sign of end of life symptoms?
I found this to be the case with my father. He also was talking to someone he saw I believe on the other side. He was saying his mothers name. I've heard other accounts of this. So one never knows.
I am going through with my baby brother who has stop eating, he has Vallarta demintal. I am really going through with family members, who never done anything for my brother neither anything to help me with him. I have taken care of him for 4 years me my husband and granddaughter. It been very hard. I do not want a funeral just a cremation. They think I am very cruel. No one not even his daughter wanted anything to do with him. Why now.
My sister died two weeks ago on Friday October 13, 2017 in an inpatient hospice unit. She had not even been there 48 hours yet. That Friday I arrived around 1 p.m. and noticed immediately that her eyes were fixed on a spot in the right corner of the ceiling. I could break her stare to get her to talk for a minute, but then her eyes would go right back to that spot. It seemed as if she was staring right past the ceiling to whatever was just beyond. I decided to clean and paint her fingernails and the entire time she just kept her eyes on that spot never blinking, never breaking her stare. Finally I asked her what she was seeing and she said "flowers"! There were no flowers on the ceiling or in her room. I asked her if they were pretty and she nodded her head yes. For the rest of the day, she rotated between sleeping and opening her eyes and fixing them back on that spot. She passed away at 7:30 p.m. I had always heard stories of other's loved ones talking to people, or seeing things, but this was my first experience with it. At the time, I had no idea that it meant her death was so close. I had stepped out of the room at 7 p.m. to get dinner. I figured I'd be with her all weekend before she passed. I was called back to the room at 7:25 p.m. and apparently she had already began to take her last slow breaths. I got there in time for the last breath, but I felt she was already gone before then. I regret stepping out of the room. I know everyone is different. But if I had known this was a sure sign she was to die within hours I would never have left her side.
When my dad died he was in a coma for lack of a better word for about a day . Couldn't open his eyes but right before he passed he opened his eyes very wide looking up past the ceiling it seemed took a huge breath and laid back down and that was it . I've heard a lot of stories like this . I believe they see whoever is waiting for them . I truly do.
My partner's father passed recently aged 82. He had full mental capacity and was on no medication at all.he simply decided it was time to go as he had been bedbound for a year after a leg amputation. The whole dying process took 2 weeks. He stopped eating. He slept 23 hours a day. In his waking moments he would reach both arms out as if someone was there to hug him. He would point to the corner and talk quietly to someone. I've no doubt at all someone was helping him transit to the next world
My partner's father recently passed age 82 he had been ill for over 2 years and had a leg amputated and strokes.he had full mental capacity was not on any pain meds he simply stopped eating and the dying process took 2 weeks in total. For a week and up until minutes before his last breath he pointed to the corner and reached out his arms as if to hug someone. He asked what time and day it was on the morning of his passing. I was with him for his last 24 hours have no doubt someone was there waiting for him to transit to the other side
I don't know about all people but just before my husband died, he looked up to the ceiling and cried out "Mama"....seconds later he was gone. I believe perhaps he saw a vision of his mother or saw her in his mind. it was a sad but beautiful moment. I also know now what is meant when the "light goes out" - something happens and the light in the eyes grows dim as it ends. It is quite peaceful.
Those who are seeing things could be perceived as real or faux. The latter from meds taken because they can do a number on an aged mind! One sent my late mother " 'round the bend" for sure!!!
I''ve seen several people in their last days say that they are seeing things that we don't; they are probably some hallucinations from a brain that is shutting down, and some are something beyond what we know. My MIL was talking to her mother and sister the night she passed. My brother-in-law was seeing things out the window that no one else saw,but other people did see things in the room that were not normal. Most people in that situation certainly think they are seeing something unusual, at least the ones who describe it.
Liam47, We can only believe what Our Mind accepts as truth, and I do believe. As for Fairytale, that's My favourite Christmas song, Fairytale in New York, by the ( Pogues ) a great Irish Band.
I believe Patients Who are Elderly and are near death after a long battle with ill health can see beyond what We can see. My own Mother passed away 6-months ago after battling Alzheimer's for three years. Mother died with a beautiful smile on Her fase as I believe Some Family Member Who Mam loved, came to meet Her. We had Our Mother WAKED at home In Mam's own home, and to My amazement that beautiful smile remained. I knew that Our beautiful Mother was happy, and this made Her passing easier to bear.
Elliemae16 -- I don't know the answer, but I'm wondering whether she stares at the floor when standing and walking or from a sitting position in bed. When my husband was in bed in a nursing home he often stared at the ceiling and looked as if he was dead. It is disconcerting to see someone staring.
Hey, Llamalover, not sure why I don't seem to be seeing these like I did; where has the time gone? first of all, hope you have a good Christmas, but, 2nd, how's your mom doing now?
Llamalover: oh, wow, re your mom's eye doc! mom had been having trouble with her eyes for quite some time - not quite sure ever since she had her cataract surgery but possibly not too much longer - so she would go to the office where the doc who did it was but she wouldn't never get to see her - turns out when you just show up like that without an appt. they just do a rotation but then one day while she was waiting to see the doc she saw hers so she knew she was there but then that's not who she saw so she really thought she just wasn't seeing her so she walked out that day and either made an appointment or at least next time it happened she went to another doc's office in another town - thinking she must have made an appointment, thought not exactly sure what she thought she was doing but another retina doctor - but, remember at that point she hadn't started back to her other one yet - would come from out of town to that office and that's who she went to see, but, remember, she wasn't having retina issues, which is what he said and turned out late he wrote that she was having cornea issues but the other people, because she'd never had an appointment office visit, had never told her that or maybe even really examined her to know it, so this one turned her over to the regular, although specialist, pony-tailed eye doctor who's office she was where this once came to, for him to treat her, who, turns out, again, found out later, tried to send her to that cornea specialist in with that later, other, retina doc's practice that he didn't know about, but because he was actually in the office where she'd been going but didn't tell this new doc that and he didn't ask if she'd been going anywhere else, she wouldn't go and they didn't know why and since that's who they used they didn't ask any questions or try to find anybody or anywhere else for her to go and she didn't know or think to ask him to, either, just kept going to him because that's what she'd been told to do. But I didn't know all this at the time but, strangely enough, maybe, but maybe not, at least with her finally seeing somebody regularly he was giving her drops and ointments, etc., that she didn't seem to be having quite the problem she was having before but she still wasn't seeing any better but it wasn't until he put her on the Restasis since she was still complaining of her eyes being dry and hurting but, from I thought I understood as she got worse instead of better, that you don't give it somebody with cornea issue, which he had on her chart, but, which I've learned not sure they hardly ever actually look at
Do any of you know anything about a drug called Roxanol? It's some type of derivative of morphine. What is it used for? What are the side effects? Is it dangerous to take if the patient says he is not in any pain? Could it possibly be used by the medical staff to bring on death?
Debdaughter: Wow! Sorry about your mom's eye issues. My mother claimed to have had 1,000 eye injections by her retinologist, but I think she meant 100 (she would often get numbers mixed up.) The retinologist, Dr. Mark S. Hughes, ended up in federal prison for illegal money laundering...$80K into a faux fund! Then she went to another retinologist who did her no good at all. But she liked him because she could socialize with him! I told her to get another who could help her. No go!
hey, Llamalover, again: my mom had the dry kind; she kept thinking she wanted the wet kind so she could have the injections, thought they were at least doing something, but turned out she also had some cornea issues, her opthamologist thought she had dry eye, put her on Restasis, before her next appointment it had caused blisters on her eye that popped, putting her in extreme pain but also causing him to find her implant from her cataract surgery had come out of place, so finally got her back into her retinal specialist, that she'd been supposed to have been going to for years at that point but she didn't know it, so he put a bandage contact lens on her eye to heal the blisters
My mother sort of stared ahead and her eyes kept fluttering open and shut. I don't know if she knew I was there or not because she was not really conscious. I held her hand and put a teddy bear in her arms, which she hugged. I will never forget it. It was so painful. She passed away that night.
my wife stares. At the ceiling, the light above. Late stage dementia. She also has her mouth open sometimes. I think her thoughts are void of intelligence.
Nursesforever: Yes, my late mother only put eye drops in when she was due to have injections in her eyes for her wet MD. Unfortunately, that retinologist had $80K of fraudulent activities.
Arianne, I wish so much my mom would have had one; I wonder if she knew what she was going through when I had her attempted to be resuscitated; now, having said that, I thought they had to unless they had a DNR, but I guess if you don't tell, no one would ever know but the nurse didn't want to have it done and I personally for myself wouldn't have but 1) nobody was expecting this and my dad was just leaving to go home, since I'd gotten there and this is rather strange and disconcerting, last thing I remember was he had gone into her restroom when this happened - though he possibly had already left the room or, knowing him by that point, it's possibly he hadn't but came out of the restroom and left the room without realizing, though thinking if the crash team wasn't already there that the nurse would have said something to him; I'm pretty sure I didn't go get him, at least not until they did get there, which, if nobody else did, not sure why he would have even still been there, since he was going home but the next thing I remember - and I'm thinking she made me leave either when or before the team got there; they don't want you seeing how violent it actually is - I was sitting out in the lobby with my dad when the doctor finally got there telling him mom was gone and he just could not comprehend it until they did have us go in and see her; it was horrible so now as to why I did it because don't really think I was thinking of dad at the time but maybe good thing I did for his sake though not sure would have made any difference as long as he saw her for himself, but their grandson had just left and actually at that point she was even still - somewhat, long story there - sitting up in a chair, with him thinking everything was pretty much fine; she'd just gotten back from a walk with the physical therapist, but he left pretty much as soon as, so before therapist started noticing she wasn't responding right and before she got her back in bed because she basically was needing to be supported; she wasn't really being able to sit up in the chair unassisted, so...he missed all that, but he was coming right back, had only left to take his daughter home, so if he'd come back and found things totally different, as in her being gone and found out I had just let it happen without trying to do anything - as it was, he didn't really believe I had because he just couldn't believe things could have changed as drastically as they appeared to have - but none so blind as those who will not see - he would have been even more upset than he was and I at least felt I knew that maybe mom at least didn't feel what was going on even if she knew it, in that sense, because, to me, she was gone and they weren't going to get her back, but I could at least tell him I had tried, so...that's what was behind that - now why it had to happen with the timing it did - well, for one thing, like someone said not everyone can handle seeing someone die and I don't think either one of them could so I think I got chosen...
I work in the hospital, and many people will seem to stare into space at the end. I think they are really looking inward, or maybe they have a glimpse of heaven, because they will talk to people that are already gone. For the most part, they are comfortable and calm. The main thing you might do is get some saline eye drops, one brand is Refresh, and put one in each eye a couple of times a day. A lot of times, when the patient is staring into space, they are not blinking, and if their eyes dry out, that can cause pain. So to prevent pain, you can drip a drop twice a day. Many times they will blink then, and that will ease their dry eyes.
As for Fairytale, that's My favourite Christmas song, Fairytale in New York, by the ( Pogues ) a great Irish Band.
I don't know the answer, but I'm wondering whether she stares at the floor when standing and walking or from a sitting position in bed. When my husband was in bed in a nursing home he often stared at the ceiling and looked as if he was dead. It is disconcerting to see someone staring.
I held her hand and put a teddy bear in her arms, which she hugged. I will never forget it. It was so painful. She passed away that night.