Do nursing homes make sure the residents eat and drink?

Supposed to do and do are two different things. While working in a nursing home/rehab I saw trays placed before a resident who was asleep in a geri (geriatric) chair. When the tray was removed the tech charted "refused" to eat. BULL! I saw this time and again. Most resident lost significant weight. Other times when a resident was out of the room the room was either cleaned or sheets changed, etc., and the tray table (on which the carafe of water and cups were sitting) placed at the foot of the bed. The table was not moved to the bedside when the resident returned to bed. Many could never reach their water. Many, many days the water was not replenished before first shift ended or after the second shift came on. Who wants warm water, if there was any at all? Place a hidden camera or nanny cam in the room and DO NOT tell anyone it is there. It is not illegal, but unfortunately, recording sound is illegal. Check your state laws. The best thing is to be there every time you can. Check up on your loved one and let the facility know you are watchful.

The short answer sadly is no. Nursing homes are understaffed and dinner time is a busy time. I was disheartened to see what happened to my dad. He had a change in medication to control seizures which left him with uncontrollable shaking of his hand and arm making the task of bringing a spoonful of food to his mouth impossible. He would sit in the dining room at his assigned table without any help. When I became aware of this, I insisted that one, they work with him to mitigate the problem, and two, help him eat. Their lack of assistance for him was cruel as he was hungry. I tried to be there for meals as often as possible and I hired a caregiver (that he knew) to sit with him during dinnertime. And like your experience, he had received very good treatment in the rehab side of the facility in the past. I feel for those family members who have loved ones in facility during Covid as that advocacy has been made much more difficult if not impossible.

Nope, nope, she's responsible for drinking water, as long as she's upright with a pulse, then she's charted as being okay.

You mentioned Rehab ... Rehab is much different than long-term care, because it generates more cash revenue streams. and b/c rehab is the $$sales driver to get people into those Long-term Care rooms billed at $7,000 per month, Truthfully Rehab is the easiest selling-point into long term care, it's also the point where many fight to get advertised services at a typical outside pace. When they realize that Rehab exists for not much more than adult day care, they'll pull their family member back into life, by bringing that family member home. Before it's too late.

Perhaps Long-term care is better described as living in a Motel6, with 3 meals per day delivered to your mom by the local GrubHub and, daily med disbursements by the local drug dealer (nurse), with help from the front desk with showering and getting dressed. And maybe a 10 minute visit from someone, from physical therapy, who might take the person for a short walk, maybe.

BUT placing her inside a LTC facility ensures she will be found, eventually, by someone, if something goes wrong.
It's the same in every Long-term facility: she will get 3 meals per day, which she may or may not eat, because legally it's her choice to ingest food or drink.
Remember ALL facilities are the same, doing minimums, to make more money, All facilities underpay whilst over-working staff. I must add that "CarePlans," are just pieces of paper, to ensure someone has seen your family member at least 4 times per year.

At our facility, one resident describes LongTerm Care as the place where society stores old + disabled people, because they're inconveniences to society, He calls it a people storagefacility, with decent food, where nobody really cares what happens, who lives or dies, as long as that revenue stream keeps flowing .... you get the idea ...

If that is lower than your expectations then you'll need to understand that everything looks better on paper, but your mother is safer than she would've been living alone.

Well first its possible she got the virus from when she was in the hospital but didn't show up until she got into the NH.  And you are right, they cannot be in each room all the time to make sure they eat and drink.  Now from my experience when my dad was in a NH, they do have drinks (water) in their room at all times.  And they have normal times to eat breakfast, dinner and supper.  IF they are eating in their rooms, normally when they take away the dinner tray they will let someone know how much (%) of their food they ate OR if they are eating at the dining area, there are people there to see how they are eating.  IF she has dementia just because they remind them to drink doesn't mean they will.  its up to them to drink. the only way that the resident will definitely get stuff into them is IF they cannot feed themselves, then they will actually feed them and make them drink.  I know I can remind my mother (who is at home and no dementia yet) to drink water at least 3 glasses a day and she won't do it because "it has no taste" or "I am not thirsty".  So you can't force them if they won't.  And you have to remember, in the NH they are dealing with routine checks of bathroom issues, bathing issues and they should all have set times.  and then you have some residents that ring their bell just because so when a aide has to be constantly trotting down the hall to care for one, another is having an issue.  And we all know that some NH do not have the fully staffed people they should, and if you have some out sick, that makes the others work double.  Talk to the administrator to see if there are any issues you have and see what can be done to help.  Again though, they cannot force someone to eat IF they don't want to.  And with the laws of not being allowed to have rails on beds due to being considered "restraints" they can only lower the bed as far as it will go and then put mats down on the floor on both sides of the bed.  wishing you luck but ask questions.

Imho, the answer is no. When my mother was in a nursing home for a broken bone recovery, her sister found her dinner tray of food in the hallway. No one gave it to my mother. Sometimes nursing homes residents, on rare occasions, are seen wandering the hallways - at least it was so in the Nursing Home in my mother's town. Prayers sent.

Is she in assisted living, memory care, or skilled nursing? Each level requires different care with a greater staff to resident ratio. AL: residents need minimal care. Are independent. MC: residents may have Alzheimer’s and/or dementia. Increased level of care and supervision. SN: close monitoring of residents. May need complete assistance with activities of daily living, feeding, bathing, walking, etc. This is the highest level of nursing home care and includes making sure resident is adequately hydrated. Rehab is another level within a NH but is temporary until the resident no longer needs rehabilitative care, or has reached the highest level of recovery for their rehabilitative issue. Schedule a meeting with Director of Nursing, Unit Manager, Social Services., her Physician, and if possible one the nursing assistants consistently assigned to your MIL. Discuss your concerns, and the possibility that she needs a higher level of care. Ask that your MIL be given beverages she enjoys. As far as covid...not sure if MIL acquired it before moving to NH or from the NH. You will need to ask for their covid protocol. And you need to make sure your MIL and family members honor those guidelines. As far as falls: all levels of care try to prevent falls. However, unless your MIL is restrained to her bed or chair 24/7, (which is illegal), or has a 24/7 private assistant, it will be impossible to supervise her 24/7. If your MIL was living at home, falls may have happened that you were never made aware of. Communication is key. I would set up a meeting with director of nursing (or equivalent), floor supervisor, and if possible, the nursing assistant(s) who are most frequently assigned to your MIL.

IMHO no they don't. They can not force someone to eat. The trays are often still full either due to the patio lack of being able to feed self, or just lack of wanting food in front of them.

NO. For whatever reason they won't devote the time to encourge people to eat.
My MIL was always a light eater. At 90 she would only take a few bites and say she was full even though she only weighed 115 Lb. SO when she was cared for
at home one lady would sit with her for an hour and over the course of an hour MIL would eat most everything on her plate. When MIL spent some weeks in the
nursing home, we paid this special person to go over at meal time to encourage MIL to eat her meals. Aggrivating but it did work. Otherwise the NH staff would remove her full plate within 15-20 minutes without a thought.

My dad became dehydrated at the facility he was at last December. Despite my constant visits and speaking either the nurse He was declining steadily. The doctor would not recommend more IV fluids.
One night my daughter and visited and got him to drink water and ensure. All that time no one even tried, They were recommending hospice.
My gut said send him to the hospital Once there he fully recovered. I sent him to another facility. He was weak from that experience but did better for a few months until Covid hit.
Dehydration again despite my phone calls and reminders to be sure he drank. When we weren’t there I’m afraid they didn’t make sure he was drinking.
It can be their illness or dementia.
Also there’s no one really giving them one to one attention .

I think after a while my dad got so weak he couldn’t eat. He also had a terrible habit of staying up all night and sleeping all day therefore missing important meals. When he slept all day the staff couldn’t wake him. When I visited or my children
we had to leave he was in such a deep sleep.
As family you can visit and encourage them to eat but sometimes we can only do so much .

Best to you

Hi I’m back. She is in a skilled nursing facility. She has been released from the hospital and is back at the facility. The other family member who was the only one allowed to be at the hospital with her said that he would be talking with the facility about having someone to feed her. When he was there with her she was asking for something to eat. He got her something and she ate every bite. I do know that she is a picky eater. I don’t know if she is sleeping through mealtime, she doesn’t like the food, she’s forgetting to eat or is so unhappy she has no appetite, and her appetite showed up because she had a loved one there with her. I just don’t know. It’s hard to know what to do when you don’t know what is going on. We’re of course not allowed to come see her except through a glass door and it’s hard to hold a conversation that way. But, like I said, the other family member is supposed to have talked with them about feeding her. I’m going to take her something to eat when I can. She loves this one thing that I would cook for my household and would bring to her when she was at home and I’m going to take that to her every week. Anything else that I think she might eat I’ll also bring to her. Hopefully that will help. She’s picky but always has seemed to like my cooking for the most part. I’m sure other family will bring her food when they can. Or I hope they will.

Somebody tried to go see her the other day and she didn’t want to get out of bed to be wheeled out to the door, which is so unlike her.

I’m happy to hear that she ate well. Hope that she continues to enjoy her meals.

I am sure that she will love your home cooked meals.

It’s so thoughtful of you to bring her favorite dishes that she loves.

Sounds like they are taking terrible care of her. I would call the ombudsman. (which will not be possible after you take her out.)
My wealthy aunt died in 3 months after being put in an expensive facility. I don't trust those places at all.

Visiting someone in assisted living who often did not eat the employees said they only give them the food but they can't make them eat it. Sometime before I had been taking care of a neighbor with AZ who did not eat the meals prepared for him. Then I got the idea to get Chinese food from a restaurant that we both liked and I got a meal for myself too and we ate dinner together in his place. He ate it all and it seems that it was because we were both eating and talking as if we were normal people. So now I sat with this woman friend in AL during meals and she would usually eat some of the food. Of course not everyone can do that. It may be important for the social connection at meal time. I have also noticed that ice cream is usually accepted. I am told that a person can live on Boost or Ensure alone. I wonder if a plate of food is too complicated or too much work to eat. Then maybe one smaller dish of one item at a time. I also noticed with my neighbor that he often had a craving for snack items with sugar so I got him an assortment of those little cakes he liked. I also did this with my woman friend in AL. I would check and resupply those items. Also strawberry Ensure. Okay, it isn't a balanced diet but it is something and seems to make them happy. Also those little packages of peanut butter on crackers. And of course, cookies. Yes these might make them less likely to eat a real meal but if they don't want that anyway, what can you do?