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My husband and I care for my 89 year old dad who has dementia. It just occurred to me what would happen if something happened to us while he is still alive. I have all his money in trusts (small as it is). Do we change wills, appoint a guardian and how do they have access to his money for assisted living or memory care facilities ?

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What do the trusts provide in terms of successors if you and/or your husband are not able to serve? Is anyone named as successor?

His own EP documents would be the first source to identify successors. However, depending on the state of his dementia and his level of cognitive function or disfunction, he might or might not be able to execute amendments to the trusts at this time.

If you have a DPOA, you might have that authority, depending on how it's written. I do have that authority under my father's EP documents.

I would reread the trusts, DPOA and if necessary contact the attorney who prepared them to see if you have any authority to amend the trusts to provide for and name successor trustees who would be responsible for his care, including placement in a facility, hiring caregivers, etc.

But you'd also have to identify them. Are there any other relatives who could step in? Close friends?

When my father's EP dox were created, we identified several alternate successors if I were incapacitated, unwilling and/or unable to serve.

It's wise to think about this possibility now.
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If both of you drop dead, he would likely become a ward of the state. Do not change your Will, nor can he change his if he is incompetent. Nor do you appoint a guardian, only a judge in surrogate's court can do that.
Hopefully friends or neighbors would call social services for him and they would see to his care.
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