Hi,
So my grandfather is in his 70's. He's recently retired with a second hip replacement that is not going so well and showing signs of memory issues.
My father is 49 years old a type 2 diabetic, going blind (is about to have surgery in an attempt to save one eye but the other is shot). He can't work.
Both have the worst diets and refuse to exercise. My grandpa lives off of a monsters and cigarettes and my dad loves soda. Neither have any money saved up. My dad is about to get disability next month and my grandfather gets a SS check. Neither can really drive. Both are stuck at home all day and need some form of looking after. I think they both would benefit from seeing a therapist or talking to someone. I can tell they are lonely and depressed. I don't know how to help them because they refuse to see anyone.
I am 24 years old. I stopped going to school because they need help and I work full on top of that. Both are prideful men and my grandfather doesn't to go into a home ( I'm not even sure I could afford to put him in a home). I feel like I do not get to have a future because I have to look have after them. I have to take care of them. I feel like my life is essentially over. I don't know what to do. I don't know the next steps to take. I am just sort of at the end of my rope and I need some advice because I literally don't have any other family to ask for help or advice from.
YOU MATTER. Don't throw your life away.
You do NOT have to take care of them. You decided to. You might want to discuss that decision with someone professional.
Many jobs offer Employee Assistance Programs where you can get counseling. Ask Human Resources at your job if that's available to you. Good luck. You sound very kind hearted. Try to be kind to yourself as well as others.
Noe Gpa. Even though I said 70 is not old, going under for a hip replacement could cause some memory problems. What kind of meds is Gpa on? Certain ones can cause problem. Research them on the internet and see what the side effects are. Then call the doctor and explain his symptoms. If Gpa in the future starts to show Dementia symptoms then he may need to be placed in LTC with Medicaid. No way should u try to care for two people. And if Dad doesn't start caring for himself, he will not live to see 70. Diabetes causes lots of problems, heart and kidney failure are two.
Do you have siblings? If so tell them you are not going to do it all. A POA should be assigned for both Dad and Gpa.
What you owe them is that they are safe, clean, fed and cared for. If that means placement in a facility then so be it. You also need to make them aware of this too. You are not sacrificing your life for two men that don't care about theirs.
Best wishes.
After they are sorted out, go back to school, kid! Best of luck to you.