My father recently passed, leaving behind my mother, who has advanced Alzheimer’s and has resided in a good memory care unit for 5 months now (my spouse and I successfully executed that move, which improved quality of life for both). Problem is there’s no longer family there after dad’s passing. My sib and I each live in different states from mom. I recently retired and spent several months living with mom and dad in their home to help with doctor’s appointments, confusing med schedules, bathing and toileting...all of it—basically got them back on their feet after severe health declines, then got mom into much-needed memory care. They were doing so much better, but then dad had an accident. Our family has never been super great at communicating, but before my dad‘s passing, my sibling and I were working pretty well as a team to spread out coverage and help support our parents from a far. But since dad‘s passing, my sibling seems to be letting the “Power” part of the new POA position go to his head, shutting me out of important decisions about mom’s future. He announced, through a cold email, that as POA he would be taking mom to his community. No discussion. No chance for input. Won’t even tell me the name of the facility or the date mom will be moved. This feels so unnecessary and so undeserved. It feels like I lost my father, my mother and my brother all at once! I feel strongly that mom would be better off in the community where my spouse and I live because it offers much better choices for quality memory care than where my brother lives, plus my spouse and I are better suited temperamentally to help mom adjust to big changes (fortunately, mom has a sweet temperament despite the dementia). Whereas my sibling has a stressful full-time job, my spouse and I are both retired and can commit to a quality visit nearly every day for the remaining time mom has left on this earth. Alternatively, a type of shared custody, taking turns with memory care units in our respective states, also seems doable and more fair. What rights (if any) do I, as successor POA, have to participate in mom’s care if the Big Cheese Sib, who is good with finances but not so much with feelings, seems hellbent on shutting me out of mom’s limited time left on earth?

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I can’t give you advice but I can say I’m going through the same thing. My brother and his wife are bullies and emotionally abuse me. I still don’t know if he has POA but he controls her money so he demands to make all the decisions. The times I’ve had mom in my care (a lot) he refuses to help me. So it is a dilemma and a battle I am not going to try to win - even though they don’t take great care of her - because he gets nasty. I am widowed, no family and can’t take care of her by myself.
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You have no rights as successor POA. It would be really nice if you are included in decision, but seems to me you know the reasons, so perhaps you were? It isn't something he has to do Successor POA only means that if your current one cannot serve you are next in line, a good thing as you don't have to go through all the mess.
I can kind of see from all you say that your brother, as current POA wants to have your Mom and all duties and care near to him while he serves in this capacity and he want not to have to argue. Men generally withdraw rather than argue.
Let him move Mom. Offer what support you have time to offer. Visit when you can. Use this time to reclaim your own life now.
You cannot BOTH be by Mom. You live in different States. You have had her near you all this time. Now she will be near you. Keep a good relationship and they may enjoy visits from you.
Wishing you good luck. You might find that this works better for you than you think it will. Hope the states aren't real far from one another and air transit is easy.
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