Do all patients get mean? I'm sorry to say this, but my mother in law has over stayed her welcome.

Lostinthemix, one thing to try is to have Mom-in-law checked for an Urinary Tract Infection... as such an inflection in an older person can make them pretty mean and totally out of character.

Mom-in-law can be tested by her primary doctor or even at an Urgent Care. Antibiotics usually cure the infection.

Hopefully this is the situation, and thankfully it can be fixed.

Why does she not qualify for a nursing home or 24/7 care. Asking because its hard to give alternatives if its because she has money.

I was told with dementia by a doctor, that nice will be nice. Mean will be mean. Nice and then mean...were always mean just covered it up well. Even the nice ones have their mean times but not all the time. If this is a new symptom, then a check for a UTI is needed.

With you health problems, maybe its time for an AL or nursing facility. Stress cannot be helping.

Dear LostintheMix,

Good of you to care for your mother in law, but I know it can be hard dealing with a mean personality. Being a full time caregiver is no easy task. Having to deal with mean person adds to the caregiver's frustrations.

I wonder if this change in personality can be due to any new medications. Or possibly is she deteriorating further due to heart disease, high blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, depression, lack of social connection. I know its like trying to find a needle in a haystack, but hopefully with the help of a doctor you can find out why her personality has changed so much.

My father had heart failure in the end. All his health issues were taking a toll. Its hard when your body is failing you.

Thinking of you.

She does have a verified by the hospital bladder infection. Currently on antibiotics for that.

Not much money, but apparently too much to qualify for 24 7 in home care, and not far enough along (she can still eat and drink and is mobile) to be placed in a nursing facility.

I wish her family could come together and see eye to eye that everyone needs to do what is best for her at this point in time. I have never been a foot dragger. But I am seeing it.