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My cousin, who has Vascular Dementia and suspected Alzheimer's, finally tried to leave the ALF where she was staying recently. She has always been a home body and never liked going outside. When I would visit at the ALF and ask if she wanted to sit on the patio, she would always refuse. She didn't even like the blinds to stay open. I was a little surprised when she tried to go into the parking lot in her wheelchair twice in one day looking for her car.

She was intent on leaving and would not let it go, even though I discussed how it was something we would investigate, process paperwork, etc. She told me she wanted to go back to Garden City, the county of her birth. We both have fond childhood memories in that town.

It's in an adjacent county and it must have been fate, as that is where the nearest Secure Memory Unit was located! So, I told her yes, we would go to Garden City. She was delighted and she smiled and talked of how she loved returning to Garden City throughout the drive there.

She was happy when we arrived and after she got settled in, she was smiling and watching tv with her new friends when I left. She says she's happy there and didn't mention going home again. I think that she thinks she is home in Garden City. Only time will tell.

I was just wondering if all dementia patients repeatedly beg to go home or if that is something that only Alzheimers patients do. Does anyone know?

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Thanks for your words.

I didn't go to visit for one week after my cousin was relocated to the Secure Memory Unit. The director suggested it and I was okay with it. I called to check on her and they said she was doing fine. I was shocked. She had more issues at her former facility.

I honestly don't think my cousin remembered her old ALF after being in the new one for one week. And she hasn't mentioned her house either. She did refer to an old apartment she had when she was in her 20's, though she didn't say she wanted to go there.

I think she considers where she is now her home. It's in Garden City, where she was born and I think that somehow it satisfies her being there.
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Most all of them would rather go home or with their children. They are not use to being close up and not able to go anywhere. A lot of times its best for the family ( and this is hard) to stay away some until mom or dad get comfortable and think of the facility as home. You can still call and keep in touch but once they see you so soon when you leave, they want to go and some cry( its so sad) and some get very upset and mad. But once the parent gets used to the facility and do activities and talk with other resident they will soon feel like they are at home.
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It's common in anyone who has dementia whether it be Alzheimer's, vascular dementia, Lewy Body, etc.
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It is pretty common and it is the reason we went for Guardianship.
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