There is no more isolating job than this one. When I first arrived at this website, I was angry at all the people in my life who seemed to "scatter" when I took on the role of caregiver to my Mom. I am not sure why, when you need the help most, you receive quite the opposite....is it just human nature? not sure. This forum has helped me tremedously. The ability to share the unvarnished realties of caregiving, has been a lifesaver. You are always welcomed to voice your frustrations here...or offer advice to others. My best advice, if you can, is to get someone to come in and take over occasionally so you can get out and clear your head. Being a good caregiver does not mean that you have to be with you wife 24/7. Hire an in-home aide, who deals with Alz patients to come in. Do you have family who could just fill in once and awhile? Do you belong to a church or organization who have volunteers? Our state does offer some respite care for Alz. The fact that you are depressed is a sign that you need help. Please do not feel that no one else can care for your wife the way you do. I have a paid caregiver who comes by twice a week to do personal care, such as bathing and other things around Mom's apt. It has given Mom someone else to interact with and gives me a little break. I am feel worn out too...and sometimes I do not know how much more I will be able to do. But we have to make sure we stay healthy for both ourselves and in order to help our loved ones. Good luck...come here often for advice....so many nice people here who are willing to help.
Bracken Why don't you try to look for a place for your wife and go to visit her anytime. This is just the beginning. Will get harder and harder. Look for a Residential Care in your state, city. Takes a special person to care for these people. Not everyone can do this job. Don't destroy your relationship with your wife and don't destroy yourself either. I can help you looking for the places or agencies who does this job of finding places for people who need more care and the family can't do it anymore. Good luck and take care of yourself
Wow--what a terrific reply from Lilliput----I was also a caregiver-I felt the isolation-and put myself on the back burner----until I joined up with the Alzheimer's Association (local chapter)-shared the experiences. You can possible get some good ideas this way as well as this GREAT forum. It can be quite difficult to remain positive when things look like gloom and doom-but there are no alternatives. Stay Strong! Hap
Thought I was all alone there. I care for my husband stage late 6 early 7 Alzheimers. I really believe sometime people even family think this is a contagious disease. I really miss adult conversation. hard to get anyone to stay even for a minute. Cant take him out much never know what will happen. I cry a lot and pray a lot but please keep in touch. I really know what you are going through. God Bless us all
Hi. Lewy Body Dementia has a great site with great support too that I found very helpful www.lbda.org also my dad has lbd type dementia.
All his symptoms get really bad with any type of cold, allergy, sleep medications. So he no longer gets any of that stuff.
His symptoms are he gets confused, unable to think, has hallucinations, etc... then will have a great week and you'd think he was cured! It is a roller coaster.
He has just gone through 10 weeks of STRONG antibiotics IV and pill form to cure a bone infection. THAT cleared up so many of the problems he has had for the past 3 years! OMG. He no longer suffers from a chronic runny nose, he is completely clear headed and normal mentally, and many of his terrible aches and pains in his legs and back are gone...
Now with Lewy Body (if he has it) this could just be one of those weird "good times" and he could revert back but for now we are having some good days. At least I think the runny nose if gone for good.
No, I still need you all & am greatfull for all the responses, they make me feel I am not alone anymore. I have a hard time getting into the computor & been busy w/ doctors & hospital tests. May have vascular surgery soon because of recent strokes. Seeing my PC Doctor tomorow to address my depression & possible REM Sleep Disorder. Have plenty of Medicaid care for my wife & respit for me(see my Bio.). Its me that needs & my biggest fear is something might happen to me & will not be there to take care of my wife. Thanks for you all for being out there It makes feel so good. Ed Bracken
Look for an assited living that can take one or both of you. The caregivers will take care of your wife and will take care of you also until you get back to normal and you will be able to associate with others in your same situation. Good luck and bless you for all that you do each day!
This forum has helped me tremedously. The ability to share the unvarnished realties of caregiving, has been a lifesaver. You are always welcomed to voice your frustrations here...or offer advice to others.
My best advice, if you can, is to get someone to come in and take over occasionally so you can get out and clear your head. Being a good caregiver does not mean that you have to be with you wife 24/7. Hire an in-home aide, who deals with Alz patients to come in. Do you have family who could just fill in once and awhile? Do you belong to a church or organization who have volunteers? Our state does offer some respite care for Alz.
The fact that you are depressed is a sign that you need help. Please do not feel that no one else can care for your wife the way you do.
I have a paid caregiver who comes by twice a week to do personal care, such as bathing and other things around Mom's apt. It has given Mom someone else to interact with and gives me a little break.
I am feel worn out too...and sometimes I do not know how much more I will be able to do. But we have to make sure we stay healthy for both ourselves and in order to help our loved ones.
Good luck...come here often for advice....so many nice people here who are willing to help.
Why don't you try to look for a place for your wife and go to visit her anytime. This is just the beginning. Will get harder and harder. Look for a Residential Care in your state, city. Takes a special person to care for these people. Not everyone can do this job. Don't destroy your relationship with your wife and don't destroy yourself either.
I can help you looking for the places or agencies who does this job of finding places for people who need more care and the family can't do it anymore.
Good luck and take care of yourself
It can be quite difficult to remain positive when things look like gloom and doom-but there are no alternatives.
Stay Strong!
Hap
God Bless us all
All his symptoms get really bad with any type of cold, allergy, sleep medications. So he no longer gets any of that stuff.
His symptoms are he gets confused, unable to think, has hallucinations, etc... then will have a great week and you'd think he was cured! It is a roller coaster.
He has just gone through 10 weeks of STRONG antibiotics IV and pill form to cure a bone infection. THAT cleared up so many of the problems he has had for the past 3 years! OMG.
He no longer suffers from a chronic runny nose, he is completely clear headed and normal mentally, and many of his terrible aches and pains in his legs and back are gone...
Now with Lewy Body (if he has it) this could just be one of those weird "good times" and he could revert back but for now we are having some good days.
At least I think the runny nose if gone for good.
make me feel I am not alone anymore. I have a hard time getting
into the computor & been busy w/ doctors & hospital tests. May
have vascular surgery soon because of recent strokes. Seeing my PC Doctor tomorow to address my depression & possible
REM Sleep Disorder. Have plenty of Medicaid care for my wife
& respit for me(see my Bio.). Its me that needs & my biggest
fear is something might happen to me & will not be there to take care of my wife. Thanks for you all for being out there
It makes feel so good.
Ed Bracken
Thanks
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