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My father is in an Assisted Memory Care facility. He has recently started to try and use the bathroom where he is physically located at the time, instead of trying to find a bathroom. At the nurses station, in the chair in his room or like yesterday in the common seating area he just dropped his drawers and defecated in the chair. The staff could not get him to the use the bathroom and he would not agree to get cleaned up so I had to take off from work to go do what I am paying these people to do and deal with my father. Apparently they are a Memory Care facility in name only. How prevalent is this behavior from this type of condition?

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When Mom went into the memory care facility, she "revolted" by urinating in the trash can in her room. Her room was right next to her bathroom and she knew it but this is how she "acted out". The employees told me that this behavior is fairly common. They assured me that it would go away in about a month.....it did. As far as I know, she never poo'd anywhere except the toilet. She uses about 3 diapers a day for urinary incontinence but I've noticed that she can no longer bend down to get on and off the toilet and she doesn't know to ask the staff to help her. Maybe this problem will go away (wishful thinking) when she comes to live with us in a week or two because we're aware of it and can help her off and on the pot. Or maybe she'll "revolt" again. (sigh)
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My mother had Alzheimer's and started this behavior about a year before she passed away. She would pull down her pants and go wherever the notion took her--in the middle of the room, in the tub, behind the closet door, whatever. She even went poo once in the dog's water dish. It's incredibly frustrating behavior but is unfortunately a sign of the disease. They are just so, so confused. She would poo in the middle of the floor and have poo on her feet and I would tell her we needed to go get her clean and she would say "I'm not dirty!" To which I would say, "yes, we need to get the poo off your feet." And then she'd yell at me "I would never have poo on my feet! Why do you say awful things like that about me?!" Oh, how I feel your pain.
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My father wears Depends however he still knows he needs to pull his drawers down to go. He only does this occasionally and I am sure it has more to do with the inexperience of the staff than my father. I had to convince him to get in the shower in the middle of the afternoon. That breaks his routine of shower in the morning only after getting up. Once the clothes are on he don't want to shower. I pay the Memory Care facility to care for him and should not have to do their job. The Administrator's solution was for me to pay for a sitter to come be with him during the day. My answer was "I pay you to care for him so why do I have to pay you and hire someone else as well"? Just ridiculous! There must not be to strict of a requirement in order to have a Memory Care facility in GA.
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Oh wow.. what a nightmare! My parents both moved to a memory care facility this summer and I have not seen this behavior in any residents there.. yet anyway. Most of the residents there wear depends tho. My parents are not incontinent but my dad has had a few accidents on his way to the bathroom and now they have him wear depends just in case. (he had some loose bowels and he was walking way too slow).

I have seen posts here recommending having them wear a one piece jump suit over depends so they can't just drop their drawers anywhere.

Sounds like the memory care facility would be able to handle these behaviors without you going in.. I would think. Did you have to clean him up? How did you handle it? Sorry you had to deal with that.. I can only imagine... the memory care should at least be working with you on this.
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