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Hubby will wake up during the nite needing to p_e, but doesn't know where the bathroom is (he's lived in this home for 30 years) or how to pull down his pants and p_e. He doesn't have a UTI as we're on Urologist watch right now. It's a dementia thing.

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Thanx Llama - yes my dad is pretty sharp at 94 - maybe some guys should use these on long flights instead of risking injury in turbulence ... lol [especially if they crawl over you all the time]
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I've changed to diapers for the night. Hubby doesn't have the feeling to go now. GP said to notify Urologist. Have a call in to him. Personally, I think it's the dementia because he's just falling asleep even while sitting down.
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moecam: Oh, snap! What a mess, but I have to say that your dad was clever on that one! Kudos to dad!
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There is a small bag attached but I didn't notice it until dad told me about it - he asked for it for the trip - months before when he was taken to hospital the E.M.S. put 1 on him - if using regularly I would make a pocket on inside of pj's leg to hold it in place with a snap or something to close it
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moecam: Doesn't that fill up very fast or is it a separate collection bag for urine?
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Cheyanne93, I went through as many as posts as I could. Did anyone suggest that you put an adult onsie on him for the nighttime? It snaps in the back and he would not be able to get it off and therefore not able to take off the undergarment. It would make him unable to take off his one piece pj and he would therefore pee in the adult undergarment that he has on.

Hopefully, he would stop getting up to go to the bathroom. I would discuss it with his doctor to see if he thinks it would be safe for him. You have to get some sleep. If you are not in a position to play for overnight care, you will soon be very burned out from lack of sleep. Take care.
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Have you heard of a condom catheter? - also good it travelling - when my dad was transported to nursing home that's what he wore so no problem in the 3 hour trip - worth looking into
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My 86 year old father would have to go 7 times a night. I thought he was sleep walking when I would spend the night because he was trying to get out of bed so much to pee. He would just stand there and nothing would come out. Then he would drench the bed even with 2 overnight max depends. He was on a catheter for a while but it got messy. He did not want to clean or change the folley and would back up. The doctor finally decided since my dad was in good health otherwise for his age other than him having diabetes, he performed a surgery on his prostate to remove so that it would take the pressure sensation away so that he could pee. It worked! My dad still has to wear diapers since he is somewhat incontinence but he no longer has that pressure to always feel like he has to go and then only a dribble comes out making his get up and down. Which was not safe since he fell trying to rush and get out of bed and make it to the bathroom. The problem would be his bladder was not emptying so at some point during the night it would release during bedtime and he would wake up soaked. Now since having his surgery, I can get him to do a good release before bed time and wake him up once in the night to go again, and he will not drench the bed or if I do not wake him up he is no longer as wet as he used to be. I hope your husbands finds some relief. Did his urologist try him on those pills for prostrate in helping with flow? Good Luck!
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Cheyenne93: Okay. Thanks for the quick update.
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Llamalover Yes, we've been to the Urologist. The Dr. has done all he can besides surgery. So, yes, Depends definitely at night.
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Cheyenne93: Bear in mind an older man doesn't have to have dementia to have frequency to urinate in the middle of the night. Get him checked out with a specialized doctor to see if he has an enlarged prostate. Dimes to dollars says he does-just an olde time saying. Then put a thick nighttime Depends pad/diaper on him. Is he able to use a bedside commode?
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Joann29, you do not tape the pull ups to the skin. You tape around the waist on top of the disposable pull up pad. It prevents stretching, making it impossible to pull down. Kind of like a belt, only its tape.
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RescueMe, I finally had to just stop reading about 1/3 of the way down, you have abbreviated so much or used your own shorthand that I wasn't sure what you were trying to say. If you care to spell all the words out, it might make more sense. Other than that, after reading all the notes here, I would definitely recommend a person that comes in at a night shift (11-7) that your husband can get to know, then depend on her/him to take him to the toilet at night. They can either just sit there and read (at a lower cost to you) or do something like fold laundry, wash his clothes, clean and mop the bathrooms and kitchen, etc. A sitter shouldn't be more than 6.50 an hour and a caretaker will cost you around 10.00 an hour. I would talk to Medicare/Medicaid/other ins. to see what their portion of coverage would be. Does he have any trouble going to the bathroom during the day or is this just a night thing? You both need your sleep and some adjustments may need to be made. it. Also, if you put your husband in adult day care at a program every day for about 7 hours, you can stay up with him at nights, drive him to the day care and drop him off, then go home to sleep. This has worked for some people.
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My father takes his depends off during the night, sometimes stands at the bedside commode, not having a strong stream anymore (mess), and sometimes walks down the hallway to pee, leaking all the way there! I have small battery lights clamped on his commode, and the dr. Gave him a pill to relax his prostate muscle, letting him completely emptying his bladder before bed. Cut his peeing time down in half. He's in the middle of dementia, but I don't think that was the problem. At least not now!
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My husband with severe dementia will get up several times a night to pee If I don't get up with him he will wet his PJs or if the toilet is closed he will pee onto the top of the closed toilet which then goes on the floor. I find if I give him enough Saw Palmetto he will get up only once or twice instead of 7 times. Sometimes he will even sleep thru the night
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the 2 wor three disposable urinals work best for me. sometime he.will just see it there hanging on chair next to bed.And he stops getting up lays back down.
he fights the diapers.he cannt use his fingers very well.I let him have longer nails he uses themto pick thins up and un do chothes. nshg home has a fit but he hasnt tried to srcatch anyone and its actually used as prostetic he has sensory defecit and his hand were smashed. They arent offering ot even though he hads orders.
I asked the pain mgmt orthopedic.who does sport med rehab. so hes going to see what he can do. he has a shoulder /joint/ and upper arm prostetic r, he cannt open his armpit up I had him better than Dr surgeon expected but they dont do anything for him. He satays filty and hair and body stinks.
I think they got mad when the hospice nurse bathed the people they said they couldnt.
A lot of talking but, distracting him gets it done he has a million excuses. convincing too. You have to do it without touching him which hurts.
glad you able to get night time help. They wouldnt give that to me with his medicaid longterm care.
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TwoPupsMom - how about some heavy pj's and socks.
I'd also let him be uncovered for about 1/2 of an hour to see if he realizes he's cold and will cover up himself.
To me, Hubby is just like a kid. I'd suggest to my kids something and see if they could figure it out on their own in a non-dangerous way. Like the 1/2 hour for hubby's blankets.
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JoAnn29, yes, he has. At 93, the urologist cannot give him any more meds. Only surgery and that's not an option for a man my Hubby's age.
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I assume he has been checked forr prostrate problems? If not, he should be. When it's enlarged they "get the erge" but can't go. Taping, not good, maybe allergic to the adhesive. I am and when pulled off, takes skin. Sleeping pills would be next thing.
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Mine gets up also, I leave the shower light on in the bathroom and a spot light that shines down on the toilet when he gets in front of it. Also on his bed stand I added a very soothing large nightlight so he can find his way back to be, I'm still up though as he can never seem to get his blankets back on.
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After writing this, I made the decision to have night time help. I'm working with the Agency that provides me the day time help. So, I'm back on a roll again learning something new. And it will be ok.
A man was sent once because when asked, I didn't care if a man or woman came. Well, no more men. Hubby, being in law enforcement, didn't like this burley gentleman helping him at night. So women at night only. Daytime? Well, we'll see if and when I'll need a full time daytime caregiver.
Thank you for your answers.
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I think even with a catheter, he will have the urge to get up to urinate. Then he will have the added obstacle as a trip hazard. My FIL used to pull his catheter out in rage when it got in his way. I would ask the urologist for medication to suppress the urge. Or hire a nightime aide who can assist him.
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My father uses two urinals next to the bed. I put two so if one is getting full less chance of spilling and more chance of finding one. He usually can use it ok. Some is peed on the carpet but way less. Good to have a great carpet cleaner.
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In the past, someone on this website suggested duct tape around the waist of the pull up pad. Prevents them from being pulled down. You use medical scissors (no sharp points) to cut them off. I haven't tried it, but it sounded like a good idea, especially if this a problem in the daytime.

I have found with my husband it works best to let him stay up after the first time he wakes up to pee around 2 a.m. He will have a bowl of cereal & fall asleep on the couch for the rest of the night. I go back to sleep too. For some reason, he will keep waking up if I keep putting him back to bed. I think part of the getting up is him thinking he needs to go to work. Eating cereal tries him out, I guess, & he forgets about going to work.

Recently my husband has started wanting to go pee every 10 to 20 minutes starting around 3 p.m. Drives me crazy!! A form of sundowning? Sometimes I can sidetrack him with activities, like "folding" laundry. I have a basket of old clothes & towels that are always in the basket. He doesn't notice that they are the same & always in the basket.
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The best answers are a nightime onesie, Jenny from Kin's makes excellent custom ones, or if you think he eill tsmper snd try snf unsnap and make s mess, then s restraint bodysuit it denies complete diaper sccess , nothing to pull down or bypass to try snf use the toilrt,thr zipper csn be made in the back eith a key in thr xipper to unlock as well as be covered by s snap or a two handed buckle to disengsge to evrn get tkbthe zipper, best way to get sn idea of options for my favorite well made onesies orvto hoogle the little keeper slerper made for children there pagr dhows thd optiond for sccess denial much bettervthsn most sdult sites, babykins is a dispisper and sccesories compahy in British Columbia whose line of custom adult protection goes simply by kins , i have every model of onesiebodysuit that she makes from the hawaiin sleevless undershirt to the business casusl dress polo shirt , and adding features like pocjets and things like that are very easy, i had her add a center chest pocket for pen and Amateur rsdio for me so it was ambidextrous access due to a right side arm mobility issue and it wss done beautifully .
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There are no tricks. He need constant monitoring and that means someone is going to have go get up in the night with him. Sometimes bedside commodes will work, but he probably would not know what it is for. Sometimes people will find an in home caregiver to keep night watch so daytime caregiver can get some sleep.
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My grandfather went through a terrible time with grandma up all night. Not from bathroom issues, but still neither were sleeping from her dementia. My uncle took them to the doctor. She was prescribed sleeping pills and both confused grandma and grandpa slept through the night. All this being said if urologist clears his of something else. I am going through bathroom diaper issues too. It is so difficult when they think they know what they are doing. My father in law with dementia often will have a bowl movement is his diaper and think he hasnt then go to the bathroom before we can get to his and get it everywhere including his clothes, floor, counters and such. Its a daily struggle. Sometimes its the simple things that help.
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My question is this. How do you folks handle the matter of the night time urination process/problems? Hubby already wears nite time Depends. He has that "drive" to want to get up and use the toilet. So, diapers are of no use, either.

The last two nights I have been monitoring his wake ups using a pager system. I did this because I would wonder why his pj's were wet in the morning and not the bed being wet. I've realized his toilet actions are out of sync with his brain. He woke up 7 times Sunday nite and 4 times last night. A catheter is the only thing I can think of so both Hubby and I can get our sleep. Sometimes of those times awaking at nite, he was lucid and everything went ok. But the wakeups after about 2 am were dementia related.

Like I mentioned, we are under a Urologist's care presently and there isn't a UTI. I will double check that today.

Any little tricks anyone might have , could you please post them. Thank you in advance.
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You are right, it is a dementia thing. Those with dementia some times will get lost in their own house :(
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