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I hope that I'm not alone with this! My elder calls for her mother, even though it's just me and my other relative. We come to her and submit to her demands, but she calls us Mom or Mommy. I'm her granddaughter, and she confuses me and my other relative as her mother.

I tried introducing myself, but she still calls me Mom or Mommy. She's not diagnosed with dementia or Alzheimer's, but she is nearing her end of her life. Why is she confusing her mother's names with ours? Do you have other ways than introducing myself to cope with this?

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She might be developing dementia or Alzheimer's or just wishing for her mother. When my darling mother in law was dying, she lived with us and it tore our hearts out the way she'd cry out "Mommy! Mommy, where are you? I need you." She wanted for me to make the sugar cookies with lots of raisins her mother used to make for her as a child. I used her mom's recipe and made them every day fresh for her until she died.
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Oh, Cap-too funny! Do tell, what would you have said as Jesus? Maybe I should ask you on your profile instead of here? ;0)
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my mom came out of her sedation in the hospital momentarily and mistook me for jesus. i was flat going to play that one out but she faded back out again.
eyerishlass gave you some great advice there. shes pretty sharp..
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I agree with Sharyn. When our loved ones are close to dying some can experience seeing their own loved ones who have already passed on. Maybe that's why she is calling you Mommy. It can be upsetting but there's no harm being done and if you try to correct her over and over you might just make yourself frustrated and impatient in the process and you probably won't change it anyway. "Mommy" is a source of comfort and security. My mom's been gone for 6 years and damn if I don't want her every time I get the flu! Even now.....

You're taking good care of her, be secure in that. If she wants you to be Mommy then be Mommy.
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If you grandmother has not displayed any signs of dementia over the years and she is at end of life due to her body shutting down, she may be actually seeing her mother waiting for her. People with dementia will confuse you with another but it usually is something that happens long before end of life. My mother thinks my brother (her son) is her brother and my mom is probably at stage 5-6 for Alzheimer's. This is all about a comfort issue for your grandmother, so let her call you mom or mommy, really...what does it hurt and she needs that comfort from you who has taken care of her just like a mommy. I know it may hurt, but give your grandmother what she needs right now and you will be have no regrets for loving her as your own child. Bless you!!
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I don't think you should try and correct her. But that is my opinion based on my experiences. My grandmother, the last time I saw her, talked to me as if I was my Mom saying how much she has always loved me and did I know this? They had a bit of a contentious relationship where as she and I-well she was a better Grandma than Mom, I think. Anyway-she did not call me my Mom's name but the things she was saying really sounded as if she was apologizing to my Mom for any hurt feelings. I feel terrible for my Mom in that she did not get this apology but I sure was not going to correct my Grandma because I knew this was taking a lot out of her to say. I just told her I knew she loved me and I loved her so much. She was happy and that is what matters most. just, poor Mom.

Now my husband has a a grandma stil alive -she is 97- in an assisted living place -with much assistance now- and she forgets who he is now. She was trying to list off her grandchildren's names-my husband did not ask her to she just wanted to for some reason-and she listed them all off but could not remember his! She kept going "hmmmm, now there is one more---who am I missing--?". And my husband was right there -he was the only visitor there! He just smiled and waited and then she said"why-it is -his name-- "and then she turned and giggled! And said "that's you, right?" and they laughed together. She is very sweet to him ( but I think she is a stinker to my MIL -her daughter-like so often happens)

I just think if they cannot remember who you are they will just forget when you remind them.
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She may not be diagnosed with dementia, but she is apparently living in a period of her life when the woman who did things for her was Mommy. In her world you can't possibly be her granddaughter because she is not even old enough to be married!

Cope by entering her world. Encourage her to share her memories. Let her talk about school, about games she likes, about dating, etc. Don't worry about what she calls you. She knows you are important to her well-being. That is a wonderful, loving gift you are giving her. Accept "Mommy" as high praise.
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Once when my father was 83 years old and was taken to the hospital, he called for help from his brother and sister, just as if he was still a little boy. It's not exactly "normal," but it's common.

I would not try to correct her, or maybe call yourself Aunt Susie or whatever your name is. Be flattered that you are good enough to her to be mistaken for her mother. I just love "the truth," but it isn't very important to someone in their last years.

If it makes you uncomfortable, try to figure out why. She is thinking you are the young and pretty mother she had when she was a girl, so don't be worried about needing extra wrinkle cream. If she appreciates your care, let that be enough.
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