My husband tears things up. The refrigerator ice maker was making a noise and he dismantled it causing it to leak and a new refrigerator had to be purchased. He adjusts the thermostat and shut it down or put it on heat instead of air. I will lock it so that he cannot get to it. He is a busy body. I cannot put anything down. He moves them and does not remember he moved it or where he put them. He also suffers from OCD and is always straightening/putting things away while I am using them. Any advice on how to manage this? His behavior is very stressful.
1) Become incredibly tidy. If you put things away yourself, you will be better able to find them again. Visible storage on the counter (eg cutlery in pots) might prompt him to put other bits in the same place.
2) Put child-proof locks on every possible cupboard. Experiment to find locks he finds difficult. Justify it by the possibility of a grandchild visiting (yours or a friend’s). Reorganise the cupboards so that the things you use most frequently are all in the same place, while the others have the more difficult locks.
3) Monitor things carefully and be prepared for it to get worse. If he can mess up the Aircon from heat to cold, he can leave a stove or gas top on. My FIL turned on the bedroom old-fashioned gas heater, didn’t light it, and went downstairs leaving a very dangerous gas filled room upstairs. A bomb if he had gone back to light it!
4) Don't treat this as just a minor annoyance. It's really dangerous.