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I built an apartment for my mother because she had fallen an had to have surgery because of Brain Bleed. My sister talked my mother out of moving in when completed. my mother went to live with her instead. slowly over the years she has gained full control over my mother's finances. My sister slowly decreased my visits with my mother and no its at a point where there no communication concerning my mothers health, medications, plans. she dose not answer my phone calls and constantly changes the dates of visits. Finally after weeks of changed dates I was able to visit against my sisters wishes but she could no longer deny my and my sons visit. when we arrived she told me she was leaving and didn't know when she would be back. when I objected because of lack of medical knowledge concerning my mother there was an all out verbal attack and shouting from both her and my niece. She was yelling "I am in control not you!" I have no idea what she is talking about? My Son is going in for extensive surgery in two days, until he recovers I am unable to even try to communicate with her to try to smooth things over. I am 12 years older than her (68Yrs) and become extremely upset dizzy and short of breath with the screaming. She has taken to defaming me on her face book page to rallying family and friends on her side with lies.

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It sounds to me as though your sister may be mentally ill, suffering from dementia or has snapped from the stress of caregiving.
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How did your mother respond to your visit? Would she like to see you more often? Having POA does NOT give one control over a person. If Mother wants to visit with you, sister cannot stop her. It is complicated that Mother lives in sister's house. Could you arrange to meet somewhere else? Perhaps in your house, or a restaurant, etc. After the surgery and when things are (let us hope) calmer, try again to make arrangements to visit. If this doesn't work out, see an attorney who specializes in Elder Law. Sister has no authority over you or over your mother. If the two of you want to visit you can. Perhaps a simple letter from an attorney will convince your sister.
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What came first the chicken or the egg? Don't assume the fall came first, often the vascular damage precipitates the fall. Get checked anyway. Be safe.
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Thank you for your advise psteqman, I am sorry you misunderstood my post because there is no "family history" of brain hemorrhage. My mother's hemorrhage resulted from a fall, when she hit her head causing the hemorrhage. However a check up isn't such a bad idea. But as far as I know, I am healthy indicated by recent annual tests I routinely get each year. In hindsight I think I probably hyperventilated when taken off guard by her anger and accusations.
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I'm thinking that at 68 with a family history of brain hemorrhage, your sister may be having some vascular issues of her own. Your dizziness points in the same direction. Both of you should see an MD and be honest about your symptoms .
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Thank you for responding to my question Flipperboy. I have to say its comforting to know I am not totally crazy and you seem to have full insight into my sisters actions. I think she does have POA as far as I know, but like I said she is not sharing any information with me. I can only just remain quiet for now and hopeful that she will have a change of heart.
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Is your sister your mothers POA ? How rude of your sister to act this way why can't you visit mom when you would like you cannot shut someone completely out and then say she doesn't know when she will be back sounds like she likes to play games how uncalled for it is not a good or fair situation to you or your mom isn't it amazing how family can behave it is totally sad what options does one have when there is no communication what a hard situation for you when it wouldn't have to be as such hang in there and best of luck
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