We had to move my 86 year old Mother-in-Law in with us a week ago. She is from Florida and we had to move her to another state. She has always been a very strong and independent woman and I know this move has been very difficult for her. Below are my immediate issues:
1. She asks my husband or I almost every day if she is staying with us forever as she doesn't seem to remember us telling her already many times. She gets upset every time we tell her as she "hates this state".
2. I am not sure how to explain to her why we had to move her up here. If I even mention her memory loss issues she gets mad at me. I am just not sure what to tell her without upsetting her. She gets confused very easily and when that happens she shakes her head and says "God please just take me". She is always wishing she would just die.
3. She is not doing well with her finances; she hoards her checkbooks in her very stuffed belly bag. I'm not trying to take the finances away from her completely I just want her to be willing to let my husband help her with them. She has accounts in three different banks. She can't even remember that Wells Fargo took over Wachovia ages ago and still has a Wachovia checkbook and keeps says I don't have a Wells Fargo account.
I have no idea what I am doing and trying to learn as I go. My husband, although a wonderful and loving man, has less of a clue than I do and most of the emotional care is on me. He is great with the medical and physical care.