My 96 yr old mom has lived for 8 months in an ALF that is a small group home. Mom's still got most of her wits and can communicate and for the past few months she's started more and more complaining to me about the food, staff, other residents. The other day I got a desperate phone call that she was starving, not getting enough food and the food was always cold. She begged me to bring her food, which I reluctantly did. The problem is she doesn't tell anyone else how she's feeling. Neither the staff, any of her visiting friends, nor the Hospice personnel see any of her negativity. Only me. When I question the staff, whom I trust, they say she never complains at all, she says "everything is fine...the food is good...I feel fine". I am increasingly upset and anxious that she is only telling me her problems and not the people who could help her, like the staff. I've told her to be honest with the staff but she won't do it. She wants to present this perfect image of herself to others, as she always has, but I feel it's negatively affecting her life at the ALF and there's no need for it. I've just about given up trying to change her "showtiming" ways.