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Ok, it has been two weeks since my 86 year old father moved in with me. I have his pill schedule and blood pressure checks scheduled around mine and his schedule. I have had about 6 visits from home health care facility from speech therapist, physical therapist, two nurses and a home health aid. Just when I felt like things were settling down. All these visits were scheduled the second week he came to live with me. He is fine they are just trying to accomodate him and get him stronger. My fear is that the pit of my stomach has these ropes tangled up in my belly. Could this be anxiety? My worst fear is that I will have to take care of my 8 year old, my 86 year old father and be pregnant. Please send some good words of wisdom so I can get through all these emotions.

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Please see your doctor for your and baby's health. Then determine if the situation is good for both mom and your family. Depression is a serious concern. A health care social worker may have solutions. No one does this alone; you and mom need friendly contacts. And your 8 yr old must be considered. Good luck.
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My sister tried having our mother live with her while she was pregnant and had a 2 year old. Her husband felt it was the right thing to do. But my sister had trouble, mostly becuase she also has depression (it runs in our family) and couldn't take anything for it while pregnant. She and Mom were very unhappy. It really hurt their relationship and threatened my own relationship with her.

We had Mom move in with us (required us moving from out-of-state, quitting jobs, etc.) and my sister had her baby and is now able to take something for her depression and we are all doing better with our relationships. Mom and I go visit her and the kids once a week.

I don't have children and my care situation is mild (Mom is relatively independent but has vision issues) though she does live with us now. But caregiving is a lot a work, emotionally. In the beginning there are so many unknowns and things to figure out. I'm not surprised you are anxious. You do need to talk to someone and find a way to cope with it. Sharing on here can help, too. I also found that writing out lists and keeping a journal helped me. And I had a close friend who I emailed every day and who sometimes came to help me if I really needed a break.
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If you are pregnant you really should talk to your doctor about what you are attempting to do. Being a fulltime caregiver can be very rewarding but then again it is not for everyone. You have to take care of yourself and your family
first. I cannot imagine doing this with an 8 year old and a new baby unless you have lots of help coming in to assist you.

This could well be anxiety and just maybe your body is telling you it may be too much at this time. Do you have someone to talk to about your feelings? If not, the home health care provider should have a social worker that could visit with you or recommend someone. There are lots of options available to help you take care of your Father while still allowing you to be a fulltime wife and mother.

Probably not the encouragement you seek; however, caregiving is a lot of work and you really need to be honest with yourself as to what is involved. Lots of good threads on this site that can help you work you way through this phase of your life.

Best of luck!
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