I am the full time caregiver for my 85 yr old mother-in-law. I am 55 and have left my job to provide her care. She has the on set of dementia and is recovering from a very bad UTI. She was never a pleasant or nice person so this is especially difficult. My question is: how do I deal with a person that may have dementia, definitely does have memory loss, but remains as rude and thoughtless as she ever was? I am 55 and my husband and I have completely changed our lives to accommodate her. She has fewer episodes of dementia since I have started caring for her, but she is not capable of caring for herself at all. During episodes, her personality is completely different; she is actually pleasant and sweet. As her mind has seemingly been improving, her normal toxic personality is seen more. I do not know how to deal with this. Sometimes I feel hurt, sometimes I am frustrated, and sometimes I feel guilty. How do I cope with this?