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She won't/can't go anywhere on her own, wasn't taking very good care of herself when she lived alone, and I couldn't afford to keep us in two homes, so... kinda? She's generally just too exhausted to do the regular things we all do everyday, like shower, drive to the store, cook healthy meals, so I'm here to badger her to shower, and I keep the house clean, do the shopping, cooking etc.
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Oh, they can have actual medical problems, but often they are exacerbated by their psychological pain. The doctor expects that most of my loved ones' actual medical issues will greatly improve, if not go away when her anxiety and depression are brought under control.
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I certainly relate to your situation. I've been there for many years. It can really stress a family. I do feel for you. There is reason for hope though.

Everyone is different, but I would start with her doctor. What I learned from him and researching my mom's ailments was that certain mental health conditions can cause physical symptoms. Even though they seem contrived, fake or exaggerated, they often will not just go away without treatment and often Depression and Anxiety can cause real medical problems like recurring infections, back ache, headaches, feeling dizzy, nausea, exhaustion, sleeping disruption, itching,ear aches, etc. I would ask about medication and a psychiatric evaluation.

I never thought my loved one would agree, but she's now agreeing after years of denial. She's also trying a new medication. Her primary care doctor says meds with the psychiatrist visits are the best route for healing.

Over time, I had stopped responding to the constant complaints. After a while, I would just say, you'll need to see your doctor about that. I would not discuss her complaints.

What really made the impact is when her primary told her pointblank that she needed help. She had so many alarmist doctor and ER visits and nothing was wrong with her. She was completely exhausted and in mental pain. She told him she wanted to go. So, hang in there. There is always hope.
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Does uour mom have other limitations that make it necessary for her to live with you, or be supervised?
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