My Mother has Dementia, Osteoporosis, Scoliosis and we believe cardiac problems. She cannot accept the fact the doctors tell her not to drive although she wouldn't feel like it if she did. She has sudden onsets of pain, nausea and blackouts along with confusion. I'm sure it is a result of losing her independence, however, she is upsetting me with constant talk of suicide. This evening it was lashing out at me saying no one wanted her around so she began to threaten again. I do everything for her and she has Hospice. Her pain is under control but her mind seems to be getting worse everyday. She said so many cruel, hurtful, cold hearted things to me this evening. My heart was racing so bad (I have a heart condition). When I told her how I was feeling she responded with 'that's your problem, I'm going to bed' as she turned out the lights. I was in shock since this is not like her. I stood at the door with tears in my eyes when she screamed at me to shut the door because she was cold. I left but drove around a while. She did call me and said that I left so fast, she wanted to know if I was mad at her. I told her no and asked if she was mad at me. She answered no but her voice wasn't right. There have been times growing up and after that she has behaved this way. 'I'm sorry' was never in her vocabulary. She could be very cold and hurtful but never thought she was because she couldn't accept doing something that was wrong. I'm not sure how to handle things now since she told me she didn't need me anymore and wanted to change her will, bank account, cancel Hospice, etc. I told her I didn't care about her things but she what she heard was I don't care .... about you. I've spent 19 years looking out for her and the last 6 months taking her daily food (or she wouldn't eat) paying her bills, driving her to appointments and caring for her night to night while she was vomiting non stop. She takes a time released morphine that has her pain under control and less nausea unless she insists on doing more than she should and then suffers or she forgets to take her med's I have on her nightstand and in the kitchen. Tonight's outburst was extremely difficult for me as we have always been very close and she showed no feeling or compassion towards me and my health. I have a heart condition and am under doctor's care. I don't know if she will forget everything tomorrow or be confused about the things she may remember. It was so stressful I just want to stay away for a while besides preparing her morning and nightly medicine although I can have someone else do that so I can just stay away. I am so hurt and stressed more than my cardiologist would be happy with. Any suggestions on what to expect tomorrow? Is the morphine causing this personality change or is it the dementia and losing independence? Why talk of suicide constantly when she lost her youngest that way which devastated her and she blamed herself although she had nothing to do with it. Should I tell the Hospice RN about her comments? I guess I needed to vent while I'm still in tears and trying to calm down.