My mother is 85 yr old. The last couple of years she has become more angry and aggressive. She would complain about everything. Everything she is not happy with, she takes it out on me. She is angry about her sister, her parents, that they have treated her badly during her childhood. She yells at me all the time and becomes physical at times. If she thinks I have done something wrong, she slaps me and hits me with objects like a hanger or an umbrella, until I bleed. Initially, I just thought it was part of aging until recently, she was diagnosed with dementia having it for 2 years, which makes sense now.
I am her sole caretaker. She doesn't trust anyone and she thinks I am scheming up something behind her back. I am exhausted and drained. Unfortunately, I did something that made her even more angry at me. I called the police one day because she hit me so hard that I was bruised all over. Police thought it was domestic violence and I didn't know any better. In hind sight, I should have called her doctor. It's too late now. She was supposed to go to a hearing but she didn't because she doesn't think she did anything wrong. She missed all the court dates so now they have a warrant for her arrest. I feel so guilty and so bad about what I did. I can't believe I caused her to have a criminal record in her late years.
Has anyone been in this situation and how did they resolve it? I wish I can take her to an assisted living or a home but she will resist and fight me. What is the best way to get an aggressive dementia patient the help they need?