I know there are probably no easy solutions, but I'm just wondering if any of you wonderful people have had to deal with the anger that can affect people dealing with Alzheimer's. I'm into year three of caregiving for my parents (both with dementia/Alzheimer's) and this forum helped me so much in the first year, so hoping to find some answers again.
Lately, my mother has become increasingly angry with me. Although it's not based in fact, she seems to think that she was promised by one of her daughters (I'm the second daughter, she has three) that we would live with her and take care of her full-time. I stopped working three years ago and moved to an apartment nearby. After a year of full-time caregiving, I was exhausted and have started finding caregivers to help. We now have a team of three wonderful caregivers, and my mother seems to like them, so I don't think she is actively rejecting them.....
And yet it has become an almost daily occurrence now that when she's alone with me (usually when my Dad goes for a nap) she starts to tell me how disappointed she is in me and how angry she is that I'm not doing more. I know that it's not "her" talking, it's her fear, but that doesn't make it any easier to handle or respond to. I spend a lot of time saying "I'm sorry that you're disappointed in me, Mom" and I'm happy to take the blame for everything that goes wrong - which seems to pacify her somewhat.
I find I'm dreading my days with her and sinking into a pool of self-pity, which doesn't help. Has anybody struggled with this, and did you find a solution or response that worked? Thanks!