It's been a while since I've posted but my father's situation has not improved. He has been diagnosed with dementia, and although I was in denial about that, hindsight is 20/20 and he has had noticeable personality changes going back 2-3 years and unfortunately it seems to be getting worse.
My concern is he has high calcium due to issues with his parathyroid. He was given medication to lower his calcium which he refuses to take and met with a ENT doctor after being referred by his PCP who advised surgery to remove affected parathyroid glands. He has refused surgery.
Meanwhile he is depressed, sad, mean, angry, not social at all and basically has nothing to say unless he is complaining or fussing. What makes me angry is its obvious he does not feel well at all yet he's not doing anything about it. He goes from saying he's ready to give up, once or twice he mentioned taking all his other meds at one time just to get it over with and then the next day when asked how he feels he says he feels good - although it's obvious he doesn't. He has a headache everyday, grunts and moan all day and just seems miserable.
I'm so mad at him, but I try to remind myself that I have no idea how it feels to be 84 years old. The thought of surgery is not pleasant at any age but I'm sure for an elderly person it really scary. He has terrible hearing and depends on hearing aids that may or may not help. So when doctors and/or family talk to him about his health, meds and surgery even if he can hear that particular day he pretends not to. I just feel like I should be doing something...but what?