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I live in Dubai (but moving back to be closer to my dad); my father was put in the SNF and I was not told by his wife where he was for about 6 weeks. I am concerned that she can determine whether or not I see him. I don't care about any monetary aspects of his estate, I only want to see him as much as possible without having to worry that she can keep that from happening. I would like to have little to do with her but will do what I need to to see Dad.

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I doubt that she can keep you from seeing him without some legal reason. I'd contact the SNF and tell them that you will be moving closer so that you can see your dad often. Let them know that his current wife isn't friendly with you. They've seen this before and should have some advice for you if you need to take legal steps.
Good luck,
Carol
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just make sure she's not there when you visit, not good vibes for your Dad
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