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Mom and Dad were married for 70 years; Mom died one year ago. Maria was a part-time care giver for Mom and has been a part-time assistant for Dad since then. He is 92, very sharp and still athletic (rides his bike daily, drives, etc.)

In the last two weeks he has brought up multiple times the idea of marrying her and why it would be beneficial for HER if he were to do so. He wants to thank her for taking care of him by marrying her so she 1) gets his insurance benefits, 2) receives his social security benefits, 3) can shelter money from her ex-husband. He says she can still have boyfriends and live her normal life.

Needless to say, I am flipping out. He is taking his paperwork to his lawyer today to talk with her about this.

This is disgusting and he refuses to see that she is manipulating and preying on him. Please help. Any advice is appreciated.

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Sorry, forgot to add: there are 2 issues here - one is the possibility that you could be harmed, and the other is that you could be wrongfully accused of harming her. Please do be careful and don't give her that opportunity.
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I don't know if it would help with his SS. I believe they have to be married 10 years before she is entitled to his full SS benefits. I'm not sure about this, but it is how it used to be. She would be entitled to his estate, however, no matter how short they were married. Smells super fishy to me.
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If he is legally competent there is little you can do except to talk sense to him. To him, she is intrigued by his charm and good looks. To think it could be otherwise would be a blow to his ego. Perhaps you can investigate the rules for SS when it comes to spouses, then use that as a reason not to pursue marriage with such a young woman. It is a tough one. How do we stop something from happening without hurting a person we care about? She might have history if you snoop around a bit. Maybe she is honest, but there are predatory women out there looking for men to take care of them.
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How do we know that he's even asked the caregiver about this? Maybe he has, maybe Kori is even hearing about this from her, but Kori hasn't said so. Hold your fire until we know that she isn't entirely blameless, please!
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Something that stuck out in your last post, kori, is that she is from Mexico. Is she a citizen? The government can frown on marriages done to gain legal residency.
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I agree with CountryMouse, maybe the Caregiver has zero interest in marrying koriphilios's Dad.... thus, there is no issue.

If the Dad feels grateful of the wonderful care the Caregiver had given his wife and now him, he can give her a gift of money [or whatever] now so he can see the smile and delight of her receiving said gift. He wouldn't see that once he passes.

Recently I gave my ex-mother-in-law a sum of money and she is so delighted, I hadn't heard her this happy in ages.... she has been a great friend to me even though her son and I had parted ways decades ago. I was going to leave her something in my Will but I had a light-bulb moment that maybe she would enjoy some of the money now... as she could very easily predecease me.
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Wow. Maria has been mentioning marriage to him since the week after my mother died. When this started happening a year ago, he was very angry and disgusted by her suggestions, now he seems on board. Unbeknownst to me, my brothers tried to but her off with $5k to leave the scene; she refused, told my Dad, and now he isn't talking to either of them. So, it's just me handling everything since both of them are 2000+ miles away. Maria has consistently borrowed money from my Dad (and paid it back). The house is locked into the trust, as are the bank accounts (on all of which I am a signer). She wants to meet me at the park on Tuesday to discuss all of this; I don't want to discuss "all of this" with her because, to me, she is just the hired help. My relationship is with my Dad - to ensure his safety and stability, that's all I'm after.
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freqflyer - The truth is often stranger than fiction. CM - Her kids both live with her ex (they are both teens), he is in real estate and in a slump; she is getting a large 75K settlement for a previous work related injury and is afraid he will seek it to pay for kids/child support. I think the benefit to HIM would be the knowledge that there is someone to take care of him until he dies (as he did for my mom). Pam - I agree it makes no sense; hence, my frustration! STP - I will have my Mother/Father in law go visit this weekend; there are a good touchstone for him. As far as close friends....no; he is predeceased by the majority of his friends. I am visiting the lawyer with him next week; I've invited Maria also so the lawyer can get all of her names and aliases and run a thorough background check - it is a start.
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I would not meet with the caregiver anywhere alone, for your own safety.
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If dad brings it up again, suggest to dad that he can protect and provide for her in better ways than marriage. Suggest that he pay for her health insurance or make a contribution to her health insurance, secondly suggest that he help caregiver set up a retirement account and he matches up to 5% of whatever she puts in, maybe even be generous and he gives her a 2500-5000 lump sum to start her out. That would be providing for her while not actually marrying.
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