My 82 year old dad was recently diagnosed with dementia. He was in the hospital for 8 days and then transferred to a very nice memory care facility. He calls me every few days and asks to come home. He says it’s a “nuthouse” there and everyone is crazy. He sounds so rational when he calls. He also sounds like a child and it makes me feel so incredibly sad and guilty. Prior to going to the hospital, my once very clean and well dressed dad stopped showering and changing his clothes. He was eating cold beans and chili out of a can. His refrigerator was full of rotten food. He left his propane on and almost killed himself. Luckily, I stopped by and shut it off. He was so messed up he just stood in his kitchen in his underwear unable to say multi syllabic words. When he finally went to the hospital he was hallucinating, but still sounded reasonable.
I know he’s safer, healthier, cleaner, and better off, but when I hear him beg to come home I don’t know what to say. I can’t go see him because of COVID restrictions. He can’t live with us because of his dementia. Anyway, what do I say to him? What can I tell him to reassure him he’s in the best place?