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Even lets her drive after repeated problems.

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Yeah, it really is time to do more than strongly voice your concerns - from mom and dad's point of view, you are just the kid and your ideas just suggestions they don't really expect they actually need to COMPLY with...you need a "bad cop" on your side here.
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Thanks for the answers. I have stepped in and strongly voiced my concerns - especially over driving. He took her keys away a year ago, but just recently when they were visiting I learned she is still driving. They RV around the country and when the roads are too small for the long load of RV/Jeep, they disconnect the Jeep and she follows the RV. That just scares the daylights out of me. I know her doctor said she shouldn't drive, maybe I need to pursue it that way or directly with dmv.
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mlb523, I think our elderly parents want to keep things the way they always been. They are blind to the fact that they can no longer walk or think as clearly. They want to hang onto all the independence they can, even if it might harm them.

Could be that your Dad doesn't really notice your Mom's Alzheimer's because it comes on slowly and being with someone 24 hours a day he really don't notice the change.

I remember when my Dad wanted more independence and was going to start driving again at 94. He's not physically able to do so.... so he said he will have Mom [97] drive... I had to remind him that Mom is legally blind, but he replied that he could tell her when to turn right, when to stop, when the light is red... then I had to remind him that Mom is also now deaf.
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She can't be allowed to drive. You will have to be the bad person and make the DMV report on that, or get her doctor to. Other stuff, there may be room for compromise. You don't have to make Dad really understand or "break through" his denial - you just have to trick him into making it an adaptive denial where the things that really need done get done, with any face-saving upbeat positive possible explanation that you can come up with.
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Certain aspects of your mom's care may be left in the discretion of your dad, assuming he is competent, but when it comes to safety issues like a dementia patient with bad driving continuing to drive, I would have to take action. You could call her doctor and ask that he have her evaluated or check to see if you can report her to the DMV anonymously and request a medical review. States vary on how they handle it. Her life and the public is at risk. I would be upfront about it or do it anonymously, but I would protect her from herself and the public. He could be held liable is she hurts someone. Maybe he would listen if you explained that.

If your dad is that irresponsible with safeguarding her, then he may be doing other things too, like not monitoring how she takes her medication or if she handles the stove. I'd keep watch to see if how she's handling those things too. Are you sure your dad is okay?
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Your parents have there own methods of coping and communicating established over the years of their marriage. Try to become his confidant, support him if he asks for help and step back otherwise. You can never win if you try to come between them, even if he admits to himself that she has issues he may feel the need to defend her actions and behaviors.
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