Follow
Share

So I have an unusual situation on my hands. My dad has a very fixed idea in his mind right now that I have stolen his stock certificate. I've never even seen it, but that's beside the point, and makes no impact on his thinking since this is delusional. He's called me more than 50 times in the last day or so, each time he threatens me with calling the police. But next time he might pick up the very real phone and make a very real phone call to the police to report a nonexistent theft. Should I call them to tell them what's going on? He's done this before, a couple of years ago before he started being seen by doctors for his Alzheimer's, and I had to speak to the sheriff (they called me to ask me what I thought, since my mom had told the sheriff that he has dementia). I feel like it would be a good idea to call them myself but I don't know what they would do about it, or even what they could do. Has anyone been through this?

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Immediately pursue Guardianship. Unless he is adjudicated as incompetent, he can create a LOT of grief and legal hardship for everyone involved. Better you call the police than he does. Document the delusions and give them to the Judge.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

must follow this
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

HelperMom, I would go the sheriff's office in person and let them see you and see that you're the rational one.

You say it's over for now, but it will happen again.

Captain has a very valid point, you don't want to find yourself in a situation where you have a cop with their gun in your face. And if you're in a small community you usually have LEO that aren't trained to deal with situations regarding mental illness, and will think "oh the elderly person has to be telling the truth".

Go see them in person and get this documented and in their computer.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

My mom called the police to ask for help--then told them I was keeping her prisoner. I found good advice and lots of support from my county's Adult Protective Services--they were very helpful and professional.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

It's a common accusation: stealing. My mother told everybody my husband stole her wallet when she had given it to me for safekeeping. I would not give her the wallet back because the last time I did, she ran away from her care facility (3000 MILES away). I finally gave her the empty wallet back with some money in it and she seems satisfied with it. The stealing accusation particularly aggravated my husband as he is law enforcement. She swears the aides steal from her...anything she can't find she knows they stole it. Can you cook up a fake stock certificate and let him 'find' it in his room?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Hi Theadora -- thank you for your story. Scary to think I could go through this for another 10 or 15 years. He eventually gave up on the idea, saying that he had found the paper he was looking for. So that's over with for now!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My mum went through this for many years with her mother. Everytime mum went to visit my grandmother would wave her off and an hour or two later ring the police to report my mum had stolen family papers. The police ended up with it noted down as my grandmother would report every time that she had those papers just a day or so ago. It went on for the last 15-20 years of her life. I also agree that it is best to let the police know what is happening
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

mom accused me of stealing 700 dollars in cash from her . when we found the missing cash she gave it to me for safekeeping . it would be more comical if it werent so tragic . your loved one is dying brain first .
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

i would definately ask the sheriff to make a notation on the dementia . you could be shot and killed in your own bedroom based on the delusions of a mentally ill person . the mentally ill are notorious for being very convincing . i called and warned our sheriff about moms paranoia and dementia and we ended up having a pretty friendly chat about it . his MIL was in the same situation . loved him most days , deeply distrusted him on other days . he said the county is full of such cases . before it was over mom was seeing people being hanged outside the rear window , workmen traipsing thru the house knocking holes thru thewalls , burning outbuildings , etc . it will get worse , thats my message here . my favorite story is mom telling hospice that i was trying to kill her -- but -- she didnt want me removed from the house , just wanted them to get me to my va shrink . she said she knew she was crazy but i was crazier . i took that as a compliment ..
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I haven't been through this, but I would tell him that you've got the certificate in your safe deposit box. This may be enough to calm his fears. Or ask him the name of the company and promise you'll write to them for a replacement copy. Challenging his delusion won't get you anywhere, you need to join him in his frightening, insecure world for a bit. If the Sheriff is aware that he has dementia, I wouldn't worry about that.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.