Hi all,
My 88-year-old dad is in respite, not liking it and shouting lots. (I know he has scared some of the other residents.) He is actually a very sweet man, his carers recognise this. He yells, (he’s yelled at me through frustration) then wants someone to sit with him. He’s stopped going into the lounge and dinner room. He says he wants to go home all the time. I wonder if it’s a whole mixture of things; frustration, depression, anxiety, wanting to be home, etc. (Out of the last 4 months he’s only been at home 3 weeks. He's been in either hospital rehab or respite. I’d feel frustrated too.)
He has been in respite for two weeks and they (GP and home, he is on an assessment) have said he’s not ready to go home in two weeks. He needs longer to get stronger, eat and drink. It’s a good home. Me and mum (83) are worried and don’t know what to do. (He’s also waiting for an mri/memory clinic appt.)
Any advice greatly received.
appreciate your response
i agree; the home’s GP is also my dads regular GP and when he saw dad the other week he said to me it’s too much for your mum at the moment; The home also recognised that. I didn’t realise the statistic was that high :( 30% is a lot.
its a private home but our SW said the local authority lease a percentage of beds,
can visit - me and mum been visiting each day (which I know may be too much but hed been so distressed) but I now have covid so can’t go :(
This time hospital wise, a poly vagal episode and then they found an electrolyte problem, treated with iv
rang this morning (didn’t yesterday); they said he’d been calmer this morning but he got upset at the end of our call, so I’m now worried he will start getting upset and shouty, It is breaking my heart.
30% of carers die before the person they're caring for. It is a statistic to bear in mind.
Are you able to visit him? Who's providing the respite care? - is it an NHS intermediate care centre (they're coming back into fashion in some Trusts) or a private provider or who?
What took him to hospital initially?