My Dad has some kind of undiagnosed Alzheimer's or dementia (he would never go to doctor). He has been getting worse and worse, cannot pay his bills, forgets I do not live in the same city as him etc. Then when he got cancer he did not know what cancer was and forgot they told him he had it. After the treatments, he began to have delusions and hallucinations. He called the police about a delusion, got lost and then wandered into the ER. Now they will not let him go and I am having him placed in a locked memory care unit. My question is, is a memory care unit the right choice for him? He is confused but lucid enough to want to go home and they won't let him. He threw a phone and is hostile and they are using antipyschotics which kind of work but he has flare ups and they have a security watch on him. Should he be going to a "nursing home" or a psych facility? I wish someone had told me about the possibility that they will kick him out of the memory care unit if he is aggressive or violent. Please help.

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This happened to my mom soon after she entered memory care two years ago. She was hospitalized for a psych evaluation. They were able to get her stabilized. But this was a constant challenge over two years. Always trying to find the med adjustment that would work for her. In February this year she became completely unmanageable and was asked to leave, find another care situation.

She was moved to a smaller group home that provided better level of care for her. Everyone there had been kicked out of previous facilities because of behaviors. It was an excellent place for her to be. She had been on hospice since October, and passed on June 1.
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Thank you for your ander I really appreciate it.
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Ander355, so sorry you and your Dad are going through this. A secure Assisted Living/Memory Care unit is a good starting place for your Dad, if he can afford the monthly cost. Once the right combination of medicine is used, your Dad should calm down.

My Dad was in Memory Care and he really liked being there, and I was relieved to know that at night the building doors were locked, so no wandering outside.

Your Dad can keep his Assisted Living/Memory Care room [keep the payment of rent current] if Dad is in the hospital having his meds adjusted. Sounds like he might have to go this route for awhile.

As for Dad wanting to go home, please note the majority of people who have Alzheimer's/Dementia, "home" means the place where they grew up, not the previous address.
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