Follow
Share

This was done last august. He had no knowledge of it and was upset when his house mate reminded him that he did in fact sign the paper (the driver is her best friend. We (his daughters are now stepping in as he has come to terms with the fact that he needs our oversight financially and healthcare wise. Can we ask the son to sign anything do that the sallie mae loan is reverted back to the boy. My father did this he thinks because he was talked into it so the boy could get a lower interest rate. Is there anything we can do? My father us going to need that money or he will pass and his estate will clearly end up paying for it. That was not my fathers intent.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Yes. U r correct. He had no knowledge/understanding. We had to explain the significance. But now he's in coverupode. Wanting to protect his live- in (separate bedrooms now) and her g friend because he knows that we will go after her. So, to shaking off the dust, he will bring us down before we can bring him up. I'm always trying to save him. And his mind not reasoning as it used to. So it becomes our word against theirs. Sorry. Very bad day. We always try because we love them and it's our job. Who else will really care. Dementia,
alcoholism, both.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I'm glad your dad has someone to drive him around. That way, he won't get a DUI. Alcoholics sometimes have blackouts in which they do all kinds of things that they don't remember afterwards. Sometimes it's getting a tattoo, and sometimes it's getting married. Seems like your dad may have co-signed a loan while in a blackout.

It seems like he was taken advantage of, possibly by the housemate (is she his romantic partner, too?) conspiring with her best friend to get a loan for best friend's son by having your dad co-sign either while under the influence of alcohol, or feminine wiles, or just flattery along the lines of, "Oh, you're so helpful! Sonny Boy is so grateful! You're so kind and wonderful! Bless you!"
This kind of thing happens way too often to elderly people. The guy who cleans out the gutters and mows the lawn borrows $100 "until a week from Friday" and never pays it back. The daughter of the woman who comes in to clean house is short on her rent this month, and mom moans and cries to elderly homeowner, who offers to make up the difference. That money, too, is never repaid.

Implicit in many of these transactions is the unspoken threat that the person who asks for money will no longer come around and help out if the "loan" isn't forthcoming. It's really a shame, and it happens all the time.

I doubt your dad can rescind his signature on the loan at this point, if he hadn't been judged incompetent before he signed. .
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Shakingdustoff, you have not been hounding me about AA. You are being supportive by urging me to take care if myself in the process and that is good advice. Also, It's challenging trying to read through what is truth and what is manipulation so you provide good reminders to keep me grounded. I'm sorry to hear of your difficulties with your mom and I'm impressed that you have been able to pull yourself up by the bootstraps given what you yourself have been through. Best wishes.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Thank you all for your insight. Thank you GardenArtist for some good advice. I'll check his hospital records and bloodwork. Shakingdustoff, I hear you and will let you know when I start those meetings...I appreciate your reminders.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Just realized you wrote that your father is an alcoholic. If he was inebriated when he signed, he truly may not have known what he was doing. That may also have been the case when he presumably signed any loan application.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

You said your dad co-signed last August but has no knowledge of it. Was he seeing any doctors for memory or dementia related issues before or at the time he co-signed the loan?

If there are any doctor's notes that he was not of competent mind to handle legal and/or financial affairs at the time, you might have a case on that basis.

I haven't read any Sallie Mae loan documents but a loan package typically requires acknowledgment that the mortgagors are actuing under their own free acts and not under duress, and that they understand the terms of loan. It seems that wasn't the case with your father.

This may be like asking politicians to be honest, but it's worth a try: see if you can quietly get a copy of the loan documents from Sallie Mae; if he's a co-signer, he should have them, but he may not remember that he does.

Tell Sallie Mae they've been misplaced and don't go into any of the details of the signing. Then read them to see if there are any representations made in signing that could be refuted if your father was documented by doctors as having comprehension issues. If so, that's the time to see an attorney.

Was there any kind of face-to-face closing when the loan docs were signed?

Another possibility is to check with your community or your father's senior center in his community to determine if they have free legal counseling for seniors. Many cities in our area do, weekly or biweekly. Pose the issue and see what suggestions, if any, you get.

I keep thinking that there is some other way of dealing with this situation but just can't think of it right now.

In the meantime, what's the real deal with the house mate whose best friend is the driver whose son got the loan? Sounds like there's some collusion going on there.

Maybe it's time to find a new driver and get rid of the house mate? Do you think there was undue influence on the house mate's part?

I have a really unsettling feeling about this house mate and what else might be going on. It seems to me that she acted out of her own self interest and wouldn't surprise me if she and the driver colluded at some time or other to scam your father. Sorry to be blunt, but this relationship between the house mate and the driver is just raising red flags all over the place.

Sure wish I could suggest something to set your mind at ease though. Something similar happened to my father, although a much smaller amount, and I was just livid. I was able to take some action, but I still steam when I think about how a scumbag scammed him out of some money.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

We have all kind of not so pleasant nicknames for Sallie at my house! LOL
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I just read a bit more about co-signing and Sallie Mae loans. If the student dies, your father will be liable for the loan. So don't shoot the student! :) If the student does now pay when exiting school, the student will be hounded to repay and only if he defaults would your father be pursued. Now, the worst part is something the student needs to worry about. If the co-signer dies, the student can be called in to repay all money right away. So it is actually not to a student's advantage to get an elder to co-sign for Sallie Mae. And yes, the lending institution can file as a creditor on the estate. I imagine they have to file within the probate period as other creditors do. (But I wonder if they are calling all the debt in from both the student and the co-signer, how will it work?)
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Oh, I should have read the title again -- $14K. That isn't too bad, though I would make sure your dad doesn't sign for any more loans.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This is a big problem with paid helpers. An elder can get talked into loaning money or doing things for them. It happens when the elder wants to please and the employee wants more than a paycheck. The driver was out of line to ask for help or to receive help for his/her son.

My mother had a worthless woman who cleaned house (if you could call it that) and drove her places. She learned my mother was a soft touch and "borrowed" money from her several times. $500 here, $500 there. What a scuzbucket this woman was. Of course, no attempt was made to pay back or work off the debt. She was just a crook that preyed on the elderly. There are plenty of them out there.

I do not know how the Sallie Mae loan issue will play out. How much longer will the son be in school? What are the repayment conditions? How old is your father? Was he competent and under no duress when he co-signed the loan? The biggest question is how responsible will the young man be when he finishes his school and what was the size of the loan?

I wish banks would stop letting elderly people co-sign things unless someone is related to them, but I know it is hard to do if someone seems competent.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Dad is only responsible for the loan if the "boy" defaults. Is that happening? Is it likely to happen?
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

If your dad was not yet deemed incompetent by two doctors then most likely, legally, he is responsible for the loan.
Angel
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Who's the housemate?

Who's the driver and who is the driver driving around?

"The driver is her best friend" who's best friend and who is "her"?

I don't really understand what you've written but I think you're wondering if your dad can opt out of a loan he signed on behalf of someone else, that maybe your dad was duped into signing it.

If your dad took out a loan to help someone else, if he co-signed a loan to help someone else, there's nothing he can do about it. The son signing anything that states your dad is not liable for the loan wouldn't make a difference. Dad signed on the dotted line, I'm afraid he's stuck.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.