My dad's just been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer, my mom has Alzheimer's. I'm an only child. What resources are available?

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MY PARENTS LIVE IN A SMALL HOME THAT I AM MOVING INTO TO HELP CARE FOR THEM BUT I ALSO HAVE A FULL TIME JOB AND AM FINDING THIS NEXT TO IMPOSSIBLE TO CARE FOR THEM ON MY OWN. AT THE PRESENT I HAVE MY 82 AND 94 YEAR OLD GRANDPARNETS TRAVELING MONDAY THRU FRIDAY 40 MILES TO WATCH MY PARENTS. I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE ARRANGEMENTS FOR A FRIEND THAT TAKES HER HUSBAND TO ALZHEIMERS GROUP STOP BY AND PICK UP MY MOM 4-5 MORNINGS A WEEK FROM 9:00AM TO 12:00PM. I AM AT A LOSS AND NEED DIRECTION. MY PARENTS HAVE LITTLE TO NO MONEY, THEY SURVIVE ON MEDICARE RIGHT NOW. I NEED HELP!

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Bless you... Are your parents able to sell their home to provide financial help in their care? Can your grandparents pay for you to caregive your parents? Are your parents part of a church community or other that you can approach for help? You can take a family leave of absence from work, if needed, and get paid a bit to do so. Also, if your parents are on medicare, you may be able to receive some financial assistance to care for them. Here is a helpful resource: wiserwomen.

My Mom survived stage 4 lung cancer (mets to brain) a few years ago (she's 78 and living in a NH, in a wheelchair and diagnosed with dementia). I understand a bit about what you are facing with your father.

Try to garner support around you; this is really important for your well-being.

Bless you.
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I am so sorry you have to deal with this all at once. Contact your local agency on aging for information on assistance available. You should also talk with their doctors as to home health providers in your area. The providers will be able to tell you what Medicare will pay for after doing an in-home assessment of your parents' needs. Your Dad may well qualify for Hospice care which is also covered under Medicare. The Alzheimers Association can also help with your Mom. Even local churches have groups that can help. There's lots available, it just takes time and patience to do the research.

You are fortunate your grandparents are able to help but realize that is only short term.

I wish you the very best of luck! Stay strong and take good care of yourself!
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