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I am scarred and alone. Also I have been taking care of him for 2 years. Lost my job and I feel I am slipping away. I never let him see me cry or be bothered. I'm 50 and I have lost my life. That sounds selfish I don't know how else to explain it

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Others on this thread have given you good advice as to handling the stress of being a care giver under the circumstances you describe.

But since you began your question by describing your father's Medicare insurance status, I am assuming you had a different question (or that you had two questions). If you're father is "broke" and low income, he can probably get his Medicare Part B premium paid for or partially paid for by your state's Medicaid program. Depending on what kind of Humana supplement he has, he might be able to get part or all of its premium paid for by Social Security Extra Help (but Extra Help is income and asset dependent so even if he has not assets left, his income might disqualify him). Many states also have generous State Pharmaceutical Assistance Programs that could assist. See someone at the nearest Senior Center; particularly ask for someone who works on the SHIP program (that's the national name; it is often called SHINE or HICAP or something else).
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My Father (87) has moderate vascular dementia + BTK amputation (no prosthesis) He resides in a NH, has run out of money and so have I. I drove down across the country with my two cats to assist him with bills, house, etc. Meanwhile, a plan I had for funding my own home, bills, fell through, and I'm in a deep black financial hole, with no clue how to get out.......I'm 61, and will have to search for a job in a strange city and new job market. I'm being treated for severe clinical depression/anxiety, and insomnia. I wish my life would end, as I'm in alot of pain/fear/and clueless about everything. Cannot seem to move forward.
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i understand that you stick your neck in a noose and the system cares only about the well being of the elder . i hope that changes but until it does we still have to follow our heart even tho the risk is mind boggling .
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Captain is right. You pick up and you move yourself forward. Dad has to progress on his own, if he goes from rehab to long term care, that frees you to look for a job.
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my aunt is currently in nh and shes being denied phys rehab and much more because humana is her secondary . according to nh , it doesnt get any crappier than humana .
youll get your own life back , you just cant see it from your current ( disad ) vantage point . my mom has been gone for 14 months . i languished at her house for 6 years while my house sat empty and vulnerable to crackhead breakins . i got to the point of 24 - 7 care too so i lost a fortune in wages near the end but my life is moving ahead now by leaps . im content with my decision to see mom thru to her last day on earth . good priorities have good returns ..
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