How do I convince my Mom to accept moving closer to me once she gets out of rehab?


My mom has dealt with loss of independence after 1 surgery, health complications, depression and now a broken hip and stroke all within 6 months. I live 1,5 hours away and need to have her closer to me. I drive up at least twice a week. I have brought up the subject gently, but will need to make the move soon as she is doing well in rehab. Any advice? I fear I will have to make the move against her will. Anybody else have to deal with this?

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Does Mom have friends at her current Assisted Living? Does she have friends/relatives in the area? How well did she get along in that facility? How long has she been there?

Will the TCU release her back to assisted living facility? Or are they suggesting a nursing home? What kind of facility are you looking for in your area?

It certainly would be more convenient for you if she lived closer to you. And in some ways it would be nicer for her, too. But what you've told us isn't enough to get an idea of what she would be giving up. WHY doesn't she want to move closer to you?

In any case, as Eyerishlass points out, you cannot force a competent adult to move against her wishes.
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How would you go about making your mom move against her will?

Talk to the people at rehab. Create a united front with a social worker, a couple of nurses who know your mom well, an opinion from her Dr. and any family that may live close. Present your case to her. She wants to get out of rehab, right? Well, she can't live on her own anymore based on what you told us about her situation so she can either choose Option A which is moving in with you or Option B which is moving to a nursing home.

Your mom has suffered many losses in a short amount of time. Devastating health issues. This is a very difficult time for her. Does she have the money to have around the clock care in her home? If not she's going to have to make some tough choices that she doesn't want to make but if she is competent you can't make her do anything. Just persuade her if you can.
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