Any suggestions on how to convince my mother with dementia to get hospitalized willingly?

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My Mother was recently diagnosed with dementia. She started on the patch two days ago. Every afternoon about 4 she goes into a Rage and it last till she passes out at 11. Reason are various from the real issues she is having to some she makes up in her mind. We are becoming afraid of her hurting herself or one of us. She will not take her meds. Her OCD is out of control. We think the best thing is for her to be hospitalized and stabilized on mood altering drugs and whatever else she needs before coming home. If I sign commitment papers it means the police come pick her up. We would much rather her go willingly. She is adamantly refusing. However, if she continues pushing us we will be forced to let police handle. This has come on so quickly that the shrink has not had time to run the tests he needs to make an evaluation and meet with me to discuss treatment plan. However the day of the initial because of her rage and symptoms I described he felt 99% sure it was dementia. Enough so that he help me draw up the papers to have her committed.

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Wanted to give a brief update. Dad got out of hospital last Thursday and is doing great. He is mentally stronger than he has been in six months. Mother on the other hand about the same. The psychiatrist called house phone to schedule tests, Mother answered and told them to never call her again. A few days later I unknowingly called them to follow up on scheduling testing and was told Dr would no longer see Mother. A first they were being ugly to me but I was embarrassed and just apologized all over the place. At the end the nurse said she would discuss with the dr about taking Mother back on as a patient. I told them it wasn't necessary. The patches she subscribed have stopped Mother's OCD behavior and she is sleeping 8 hours a night with the aid of a sleeping pill. However her mood swings are out of control. When Dad was in hospital she threatened suicide (just to get attention or I would have called ambulance), she would cry nightly from 6-10 while screaming at me about how it was all my fault. Now that Dad is home she goes into a rage every afternoon. 9 times out of 10 it is directed at me. Sunday Dad started stepping in and began helping me to manage her. He is doing so well at ignoring her rage I am actually going out of town for a couple of days to get a well deserved break. Unfortunately when her regular dr called the new neurologist with referral for testing the next available appointment is Jan 31. Bottom line Dad and I are learning to cope and doing much better but Mom has to wait until Feb before she will feel better. My Dad said if she gets where we can't control her he will sign committal papers and/or call police.
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Easier said than done I know but please try to get some sleep too
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Thanks for the update.
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My Dad had a nervous breakdown 10 years ago and the stress of the situation resulted in him having another. We just admitted in to the geratric phych ward to get him some help. Temporarily Mom's problems have taken a back seat to his
At least she is safe and now Dad is too. Getting him help and well is my main focus. Once this is done I will redirect my attention to her. This situation is so fluid and out of control I am doing all I can to keep my head above water. I truly appreciate all the help and kind words. It helps knowing I am not alone.
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(I didn't realize there were 20+ Answers, I read only the 2 on this page before posting. Sorry for my oversight and hope you can resolve the situation soon, shipmane.)
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Ship, we're all thinking about you. Hope things are okay.
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From what you've described, shipmane, seems unlikely you'll convince your mom that it's in her best interest to go in for treatment. A benzodiazepine would make the transfer to a facility a little easier but seems unlikely you'll get her full cooperation. She doesn't understand she's ill, right? If it's beginning dementia/Alz, she can't help her behavior. Whatever it is, it's unlikely she can help the behavior on her own or understand she needs help. Making her transition as calm as possible and getting her in for treatment is probably the best you can do.
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She won't take her meds but she has a patch. What are the medications she isn't taking and what does the patch deliver? The only thing I could think to suggest is to get her an Rx for a benzodiazepine, but maybe that's the meds she isn't taking...? A benzodiazepine would help to calm her fears and agitation and it works quickly.
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Well, antidepressant meds take a couple of weeks to kick in. But there are lots of quick acting antianxiety and antipsychotic meds that take effect immediately.
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We will be thinking of you over the weekend

Any new change in meds could take 2-3 weeks before you see an improvement in her mood - not sure what med is being delivered via a patch - to stall memory loss? I understand some of these can actually make folks more aggressive - unintended consequence
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