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We have been taking care of grandma for the past six years. She has moderate/severe Alzheimer's, vascular dementia, multiple strokes, and diabetes. Her most recent stroke has left her entirely paralyzed on her left side and she is unable to hold her head or body upright. She has been in adult diapers for about a year, and was able to transfer to the toilet when needed about 50% of the time. Our problem is she still wants to transfer to the toilet, but even when there are two of us available, she cannot sit on the toilet, even when propped up. Does anyone have any good or creative ideas to convince grandma to use the diaper?

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Don't give her a choice. She obviously can't put it on herself in her current condition. You will have to do it for her, put it on, take it off and clean up her butt. You can't sell the idea to someone with dementia, you just get it done.
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Thank you pamstegman! You're absolutely correct about not being able to sell an idea to someone with dementia. For some reason, I keep trying...
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My grandma had Alzheimer's, didn't want diapers, and would reach in, pull them out in handfuls and throw them over the fence in the back yard. So, let's not make it sound as easy as just telling grandma to do it, because when they're insistent, they can be quite firm about it.

My mom's way of dealing with this was just to cross her fingers during the day and, at night, didn't even bother with the diapers. Since grandma would throw them around, mom just put a rubber sheet or something like that on the bed and then stripped the bed clothes every day.

But my mom put the diapers on grandma, every day, regardless. So, you might just try it and see what happens. Whomever helps her dress will need to just include those. If she "takes" to them, then spend the extra money for the ultra-absorbent so that you have to go through the changing less often, which she's probably not going to like.
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Thank you geo123! I think I'm just in need of some positive support for this new transition. Up to this point, we have been able to 'get everything done' without too much conflict and a lot of creative approaches. Grandma is VERY insistent, all day long, all night long and it wears us down. Haven't been able to come up with any creative ideas that work and the direct approach results in tantrums and screaming. Our children never even did that! Thanks for the ideas :)
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Tell grandpa it's the diapers or a coffee can by her bed - her choice. ;-)
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