How can I convince my elderly father not to send money to scammers?

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They have gotten road blocks from the telephone company. My dad has sent thousands to these over-seas fakes and now he is talking about refinancing his home, which is all paid for. My mother has Alzheimer's and we are afraid he will lose all their money she needs for her care.

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Anyone know how to block parents from using wire transfer services like Western Union?
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Just to highlight something Palmerky mentioned about the bank's being amazing - I wonder how your father is transferring his money to these lowlife conmen? Credit card or bank, aren't there any applicable consumer laws that would protect him against fraud? I'd try contacting the credit card companies or banks direct and getting their advice.
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An additional note the hardest thing we had to do was finally take the car away from her. As the Alzheimer's progressed she started roaming particularily going out to find who took her car. She would end up at my sons house 2 miles away in the middle of the night dressed only in her night clothes asking him where is my car.
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In my experience you can't convince them if it is dementia. The sooner you take action the less work it is going to be on you to get things back in order. I had to get a PO Box and put in a change of address for mom with USPS to the PO Box. Also talked to the mailperson to not deliver any mail at all to moms place. You must change his phone number and get the new number on the National do not call list. You could put a call forwarding on the old line to your phone for a time just to sift through callers if you think its important enough but I did not. Then I notified all good vendors and friends of an address and phone number change to my own house. (I only gave moms new phone number to family and her friends but no one else). As mail came into the PO Box I sorted the good from the bad and contacted the good senders to start sending to my home address and phone. The junk mail I tried to return to sender w/no forwarding to stop the junk. I even wrote and called when I could but a lot of these people are sleeze. It took me a couple years to work out all the problems then I closed the PO Box with no forwarding address. My Alzheimers mother was ordering anything from anybody and even giving them her SS number and credit card over the phone. I got on moms accounts as secondary and started paying her bills online. In fact I setup ALL her accounts online so I could pay bills and even transfer between accounts as needed. Even insurance companies, annuities etc. In getting online accounts setup for all vendors you won't even have to add your name to things unless needed. I got the bank to issue a limited ATM card ($500max) with no point of purchase just cash at ATMs. I had to pay off Publishers Clearing House and Readers Digest for junk she purchased. She thought if she bought the junk she would have a better chance at winning the drawing. After taking over paying her bills I discovered she had spent over $3000 with Pub Clearing and Readers Digest on trinkets (junk). I always wondered what all the rotting flower bulbs were doing around her condo (another story). Sprint was nice enough to credit us back for the 5 cell phones that came to the door via UPS one day that including service contracts. It was funny mom called me and said hey, I just got 5 phones in the mail what should I do. Not remembering that some sleeze bucket salesman talked her into them. Caution also should be taken in that scammers/telemarketers can also have your phone company add certain things to your phone bill as well. Moms phone bill not only had unknown monthly charges for non-sense but also a fortune in calls to some sleeze bucks cell phone in Jamaica of all places. Good Luck but better start as soon as you can to take control of things before it get s out of hand. God Bless you.
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I dealt with the same thing with my grandmother! 25,000 dollars later and me moving my family in with her I got it to stop! I had to be put on the POA and her on her account at the bank. They would notify me if she was trying to withdraw money. The bank was amazing with helping me! I did reach out to FTC, Attorney General, police, internet crime website, money dot card, all types of agencies with NOTHING! I even contacted Jamaica government. We went through 20 phone numbers and then figured out she could call them! Canceled long distance and I monitored the phone. She has a 6 thousand dollar loan to pay off from the home equity from her getting loans from other banks after she used all her savings. Its disgusting that these leeches do this to our elderly. I for through her mail as well. Because she got a postcard stating she won a Walmart girftcard well she called while I was out and when I came back she yelled for me and asked which credit card she should give them. So I yelled at the man and told her not to give that out ever! So now I monitor the mail as well. Its a cruel world we live in!
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Better get those POAs, MPOAs and DPOAs, Living Trust and Will in place because you are going to need them! Have him quit-claim the Deed to you so this does not happen to his house. Do it ASAP!!!
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Sounds like you need a legal judgement ,see a lawyer.
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I also used the "I'll have to talk to my daughter" excuse, and she told them , "my daughter keeps my checkbook and keeps track of how much I can give to charity"
Now she is in a retirement home and altho she gets some junk mail, she isn't getting calls any more. She is finally letting me open the questionable stuff.
It's a hard place to be in. I had POA on both parents and it sure helped when I had to handle their finances when he died and she didn't have enough income to pay house payments. She had a mental breakdown for a few months and when I got her back to herself, except for the dementia, she was grateful that things didn't get in a big mess when she couldn't make decisions. Good luck and God bless.
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all i can say is 'once an adult. twice a child'
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If your parent is pretty "together" mentally still, this information may help "educate" them. I am also an adult only child, former POA, whose father is now deceased recently. He left a mess and no way to really pay for it, as he cashed in all his life insurance and other annuities to pay for his "helping" a church.

About charitable fundraising: "How You Can Educate Others"
Nonprofits register either as in state or out-of-state. From there these register with the IRS as a 501(c)(3). You can look these up on the IRS website, or through Guidestar. Just because an NPO successfully registered at state and IRS level (Secretary of State offices don't review that closely to see if paperwork is fully complying with the state laws usually), and it passed the IRS 18 point qualifying test (if you do your homework you can find the 18 points by reviewing IRS tax law cases), it still may have "problems".

Further, the smaller "charities" may need to outsource fundraising. There is a maximum amount they can have for overhead expenses. One way around this is to reduce staff and outsource fundraising. Then "x" $ comes in AFTER the expenses are already removed.

Where this gets a bit borderline, is - as a past President of several NPO boards, we looked at outsourcing fundraising. All (!!!) the reputable companies wanted at least 80% and as high as 89% in fees to do out fundraising for us.
The companies use telemarketers or mail out campaigns.

So that "free blanket you might be getting to support American Indians" or "blind camps" in reality you bought it. Out of every one -dollar donated, figure 80-89 cents of it is going to pay a telemarketer or envelope stuffer.

I explained this to my father last year and he did the math in his head at 92 at the time and told me "I'm not doing 'that' anymore!" What I offered him as an alternative: "It's great you care and want to make a donation. Let me look it up for you and contact this charity DIRECTLY and ask them how to get a check to them DIRECTLY and bypass their telemarketing. That way if you send $10, you know they really got $10 - vs. $1.10." He agreed to that, but he also didn't make anymore donations by phone - he just didn't answer the calls and used call -screening. He also didn't ask me to research any either. So the "education" worked well. Yes, he felt being a victim and foolish for a bit, but he got over it fast - and he didn't have to have me take over paying his bills - yet. That happened in May this year, about a year later.

What you may have to watch for - - my father liked writing checks and wasn't in the world of the Internet. I pay bills by telephone banking or Internet. I've never had a problem yet. No bounced checks, no duplicate checks, etc. Once he wrote three checks for the same bill in the same month and made a mess, he asked me to take over. Not bad for 93 - - he handled this on his own up til the last about three months of his life.

I believe in "empowering" seniors and elderly if at all possible - give them the information and see what choices they will make on their own. Step in only when its REALLY needed. Many or most I am finding their "worst fear" is losing independence by someone taking it away from them. If they "choose to delegate" then they get to feel it is a "right that they have earned" - vs. someone taking over.
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