Follow
Share

Hello everyone!



I'ma private caregiver for a 95 yo lady with dementia. She loops, has anxiety, gets angry, can not focus on an activity.



It all comes back to one common theme..... where are her parents, where is her husband and why isn't she at home?



I have seen posts similar to this one, and the overwhelming response is to tell a fiblet and say her parents are fine and her husband is away on business.



Boy oh boy did this fiblet backfire on me! When told her husband was away on business, she wanted to know why he didn't call. THEN, she, in her mind, talked to her husband, and he told her to wait in the lobby for him to pick her up. She is in AL.



When I arrived at the facility, I was told that she had been sitting in the lobby for three hours, bags packed, waiting for her husband.



When told her parents were fine and living in another state, she was frantically looking for a phone number to call. She obsessed about this for over 5 hours.



I decided that the truth is always the best, no matter the situation. I printed out copies of obituaries for her to look at and read. She doesn't go thru fresh mourning every time she sees these obituaries, (remember, she had little memory), she becomes calm because she then understands why those people don't call or come by.



Fiblets eventually stop working. My lady is 95, but she's sharp, even worth dementia.

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Maybe something for her anxiety would be helpful in calming her down and stopping some of the looping.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

She may be sharp, but she has dementia. This looping is very common. As a retired RN I pretty much believe in honesty. It's the short track and the easier track, even when, in late dementia, it makes little difference.

You mom may require medication. If so time for a visit to discuss this with doctor. Anxiety is, according to AARP the single most unaddressed and common challenge for elders.

Sure wish you good luck.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter