First, I am thankful to be in a “safe place” to ask advice and get your opinions, as this has helped me greatly in the past.
Briefly, my FIL lives with my husband and myself (2 years now).... he had a stroke 10 years ago and is managing PD. Husband is an only child. FIL will not shower or change his clothes on a regular basis.... additionally he grows hair like no other and it would require twice a week hair, nail trims... he does try to shave daily, but that is hit and miss. I have pushed husband to talk to FIL about his, and offer to hang around the bathroom while he showers in case he is afraid of falling, and to encourage him to bathe and change regularly. He refuses to say anything because it is “awkward”... I won’t even get started on that, but the BIGGER question is, as several friends have pointed out, if he fell or we had to take him to the hospital, etc., could this be considered neglect or abuse?... while he is well feed, has his own room and is safe, they say that may not be all that is considered.... now, we are planning to visit my MIL out of town, and as they are long divorced, of course FIL is not going. He refuses to go to respite care, and I am being met with resistance with getting a hone health service to come in and check on him while we are away for several days..... I am very concerned that if something were to happen, what the implications could be?
any thoughts????? Many thanks!